Can it be that it was all so simple then?
I turn 21 next Saturday, and I've been thinking a lot about the past 8 years of my life, and of everything that's gone on in it for me and for those close to me, and how it really hasn't turned out at all how I would've hoped. Not saying that as a bad, defeatist point of view or anything, just observing what is going on now, and what has went down. How many friends that aren't around that I thought still would be, the issues that the few I still got and mean everything to me are going through, and my inability to really help any of them. I've always been the youngest of my group of people, and sometimes I feel like I'm doing more in the natural progression of life than the rest or trying to. It's strange. I've been getting up so fucking early all week and just passing out at the end of the day exhausted. Working and not getting paid sucks. I'm surprised sanitation workers aren't permanently on strike, I never would've imagined they wore bullet-proof vests. Why the fuck would anyone want to shoot the garbage man?
Early this morning, around 2am I think, a water main broke along a busy road. City workers had been up since then ripping up the road to fix it and then putting it all back together. As a result of this a side street was covered in a bunch of rocks and gravel/sand. So we went out this morning to shovel it up and then wash it down. We set up cones at the entrance to the street and about 50 feet behind us to keep people from driving through while we were working. Regardless of that, people still drove through the cones. I had to put a big ass bucket in betweem the cones so there was no way for people to get through at all. People would still drive all the way up to the cones and then turn around, as if they didn't see them from way back down the road. Old people would just sit there in their cars, looking so confused as to what they should do, turning their car around must have been such an alien thought to them. They would just sit there until I would wave my arm back in the direction from which they came. The main street was blocked off as well, but people would still drive their cars up until they couldn't, looking for some way to sneak through the obstruction in their routine existence. One lady drove up and politely asked me how she could get to a shop in the area of the road that was closed off. I politely told her I had no idea. She began to roll her eyes at me and got this disgusted look on her face, so I told her that I wasn't working the job in that area so I wouldn't know how she would be able to get where she needed to go. She drove off with this look on her face that made me want to run her down and strangle her with the hose in my hands. These are the people who call up and make the complaints we have to go out and take care of everyday. The people who give us the worst directions in the world as to where the thing that bothers them is located. These are the same people who after that complain again about us not getting it taken care of fast enough. These are people who have such fragile worlds that when there is an imbalance to them they take it out on the same people they are expecting to make it all go away.
I got more important issues to worry about. I don't feel it necessary to take out long portions of my day to call up somebody else and bitch and moan about the most trivial bullshit. I just want my friends to be healthy and safe and alive. And I'm out here shoveling shit for free, for a world that doesn't give a fuck about anyone else but themselves.
I turn 21 next Saturday, and I've been thinking a lot about the past 8 years of my life, and of everything that's gone on in it for me and for those close to me, and how it really hasn't turned out at all how I would've hoped. Not saying that as a bad, defeatist point of view or anything, just observing what is going on now, and what has went down. How many friends that aren't around that I thought still would be, the issues that the few I still got and mean everything to me are going through, and my inability to really help any of them. I've always been the youngest of my group of people, and sometimes I feel like I'm doing more in the natural progression of life than the rest or trying to. It's strange. I've been getting up so fucking early all week and just passing out at the end of the day exhausted. Working and not getting paid sucks. I'm surprised sanitation workers aren't permanently on strike, I never would've imagined they wore bullet-proof vests. Why the fuck would anyone want to shoot the garbage man?
Early this morning, around 2am I think, a water main broke along a busy road. City workers had been up since then ripping up the road to fix it and then putting it all back together. As a result of this a side street was covered in a bunch of rocks and gravel/sand. So we went out this morning to shovel it up and then wash it down. We set up cones at the entrance to the street and about 50 feet behind us to keep people from driving through while we were working. Regardless of that, people still drove through the cones. I had to put a big ass bucket in betweem the cones so there was no way for people to get through at all. People would still drive all the way up to the cones and then turn around, as if they didn't see them from way back down the road. Old people would just sit there in their cars, looking so confused as to what they should do, turning their car around must have been such an alien thought to them. They would just sit there until I would wave my arm back in the direction from which they came. The main street was blocked off as well, but people would still drive their cars up until they couldn't, looking for some way to sneak through the obstruction in their routine existence. One lady drove up and politely asked me how she could get to a shop in the area of the road that was closed off. I politely told her I had no idea. She began to roll her eyes at me and got this disgusted look on her face, so I told her that I wasn't working the job in that area so I wouldn't know how she would be able to get where she needed to go. She drove off with this look on her face that made me want to run her down and strangle her with the hose in my hands. These are the people who call up and make the complaints we have to go out and take care of everyday. The people who give us the worst directions in the world as to where the thing that bothers them is located. These are the same people who after that complain again about us not getting it taken care of fast enough. These are people who have such fragile worlds that when there is an imbalance to them they take it out on the same people they are expecting to make it all go away.
I got more important issues to worry about. I don't feel it necessary to take out long portions of my day to call up somebody else and bitch and moan about the most trivial bullshit. I just want my friends to be healthy and safe and alive. And I'm out here shoveling shit for free, for a world that doesn't give a fuck about anyone else but themselves.