Did a little experiment today... Pretty interesting results too, and I just took a whole bunch of Phenibut (supposedly a great legal buzz, that's not bad for you) so I'm sitting here waiting for it to kick in. It's kinda odd not being out on a friday night, but I'm working on some spreadsheets for work and I want it done asap so I can chill out tomorrow...
So my experiment: I decided to change my default picture on Facebook to one of me looking like a "douchebag" and see the response I would get from people. I guess I changed it at around 11 last night and wouldn't you know it, I had like 10 girls I hadn't talked to in a long time commenting on how awesome I looked and wanted to hang out. I don't get it... I used to be like that 24/7 voluntarily when I was in college, and I must say life was much easier, and after a while I didn't even think of it as an act and I think I actually became that way. Fast forward a few years, get a job in the real world and start acting like a grown up and I'm bored as hell. Finally I think I am comfortable enough in my own skin to just be how I am and all of a sudden I have no one to hang out with and nothing to do.
I would love very much to find some interesting people to hang out with, just go to dinner, talk, whatever, but most of the people that I know just wanna be drunken bar sluts. I have no idea where the interesting people hang out but I can't seem to find any.
Back to my experiment, I think I am losing my patience trying to be myself, and ready to retreat to the relative comfort of being a douchebag. I know it sounds terrible when I type it out but most of the people I see that look interesting to me just look at me like " buddy your way too normal to hang out with us". Kinda funny how when we're younger it's the "cool" people that are viewed as the assholes....
I don't know what to do... I wish being yourself wasn't so lonely.
Now to part two of the experiment... As I mentioned in an earlier blog my friend Mo is throwing me a party for my Birthday (although my birthday is the 15th), and I am going to go in full asshole mode. I'm talking tanned, clean shaven, gelled hair, designer shoe wearing status. I'm going to just be the biggest dick I can possibly be and I can almost guarantee I can cure my loneliness (at least for a night).. but if it is at the cost of my self respect is it really worth it..
Well I got some good news too... My parents are purchasing the building I live in (It's offices on the first floor and apartments above office) and because I work downstairs as it is I should be able to take a whole lot of tax write-offs for "home office expenses", at least that is what the accountant says. Oh well, I got some work to do, I'm gunna go get on that....
SONG OF THE DAY
Reckless Life - Hollywood Rose (G N' R covered it but this is by Axl's original band and has much more of a punk sound, I strongly recommend it)
So my experiment: I decided to change my default picture on Facebook to one of me looking like a "douchebag" and see the response I would get from people. I guess I changed it at around 11 last night and wouldn't you know it, I had like 10 girls I hadn't talked to in a long time commenting on how awesome I looked and wanted to hang out. I don't get it... I used to be like that 24/7 voluntarily when I was in college, and I must say life was much easier, and after a while I didn't even think of it as an act and I think I actually became that way. Fast forward a few years, get a job in the real world and start acting like a grown up and I'm bored as hell. Finally I think I am comfortable enough in my own skin to just be how I am and all of a sudden I have no one to hang out with and nothing to do.
I would love very much to find some interesting people to hang out with, just go to dinner, talk, whatever, but most of the people that I know just wanna be drunken bar sluts. I have no idea where the interesting people hang out but I can't seem to find any.
Back to my experiment, I think I am losing my patience trying to be myself, and ready to retreat to the relative comfort of being a douchebag. I know it sounds terrible when I type it out but most of the people I see that look interesting to me just look at me like " buddy your way too normal to hang out with us". Kinda funny how when we're younger it's the "cool" people that are viewed as the assholes....
I don't know what to do... I wish being yourself wasn't so lonely.
Now to part two of the experiment... As I mentioned in an earlier blog my friend Mo is throwing me a party for my Birthday (although my birthday is the 15th), and I am going to go in full asshole mode. I'm talking tanned, clean shaven, gelled hair, designer shoe wearing status. I'm going to just be the biggest dick I can possibly be and I can almost guarantee I can cure my loneliness (at least for a night).. but if it is at the cost of my self respect is it really worth it..
Well I got some good news too... My parents are purchasing the building I live in (It's offices on the first floor and apartments above office) and because I work downstairs as it is I should be able to take a whole lot of tax write-offs for "home office expenses", at least that is what the accountant says. Oh well, I got some work to do, I'm gunna go get on that....
SONG OF THE DAY
Reckless Life - Hollywood Rose (G N' R covered it but this is by Axl's original band and has much more of a punk sound, I strongly recommend it)