As I sit here, I can't help but reflect on the last few days and the incredible highs and lows... Sparing the details, because I don't even know the truth.. bottom line I got fucked over in a big way.
Nothing like that really ever happened to me and for some reason I let this person do it to me twice. I guess it's my fault for letting it happen again, but she just had this quality about her I never saw in another person... The worst part is after she burned me the first time I was cool with being friends then out of the blue she asks me out we have a few awesome dates then bam she has a total breakdown. I'm kinda worried about her but I guess its not my problem.
I was just so out of my element, I should have known what I was getting myself into. I knew she had some issues but for some reason I thought I could fix them, again my fault.
I guess the moral of the story is stick to what you know, leaving your comfort zone could open some intriguing doors but also totally head fuck you.
Either way now I guess I can step back from the situation and see her for what she really is and how it never would have worked in the long run.
I also realized that for perhaps the first time in my life I have some real friends, and that is something I had really missed out in the past. I was talking to a few of my boys tonight after training and they didn't dismiss me as being "pussy" or anything, actually a few of them had had similar experiences and all wanted to help in their own way.
My birthday is next friday and my older friend Mo's wife is out of town so he is throwing a party in my honor. He has 2 daughters my age and says they have more friends than I'll know what to do with and he promised me jello wrestling so YUP... There is NOTHING jello wrestling won't fix.
Girls Gone WIld is doing a shoot at a bar in my town tonight, so I'm heading over there right now with my boy Doug and that is another guaranteed good time.
Looks like it's back to party girls for me. Shame too, I really was looking for something different but I guess it was my type for so long for a reason.
New beginning tomorrow.
SONG OF THE DAY
Runnin' Wild - Airbourne (possibly the best f-you, I'm going to go out and go crazy song of all time)
Nothing like that really ever happened to me and for some reason I let this person do it to me twice. I guess it's my fault for letting it happen again, but she just had this quality about her I never saw in another person... The worst part is after she burned me the first time I was cool with being friends then out of the blue she asks me out we have a few awesome dates then bam she has a total breakdown. I'm kinda worried about her but I guess its not my problem.
I was just so out of my element, I should have known what I was getting myself into. I knew she had some issues but for some reason I thought I could fix them, again my fault.
I guess the moral of the story is stick to what you know, leaving your comfort zone could open some intriguing doors but also totally head fuck you.
Either way now I guess I can step back from the situation and see her for what she really is and how it never would have worked in the long run.
I also realized that for perhaps the first time in my life I have some real friends, and that is something I had really missed out in the past. I was talking to a few of my boys tonight after training and they didn't dismiss me as being "pussy" or anything, actually a few of them had had similar experiences and all wanted to help in their own way.
My birthday is next friday and my older friend Mo's wife is out of town so he is throwing a party in my honor. He has 2 daughters my age and says they have more friends than I'll know what to do with and he promised me jello wrestling so YUP... There is NOTHING jello wrestling won't fix.
Girls Gone WIld is doing a shoot at a bar in my town tonight, so I'm heading over there right now with my boy Doug and that is another guaranteed good time.
Looks like it's back to party girls for me. Shame too, I really was looking for something different but I guess it was my type for so long for a reason.
New beginning tomorrow.
SONG OF THE DAY
Runnin' Wild - Airbourne (possibly the best f-you, I'm going to go out and go crazy song of all time)