So I went 17 months. That's a long time to be celibate. Actually, except for a single night with a good friend who moved back south, it's been 26 months
The pursuit is dehumanizing
Everyone's games and hangups always seem so tiring.
Older girls run through a checklist as soon as I say "Hi! I'm Geoff" they (not so subtly) ask my job, housing, marital status, parenthood status, and I know all these things are important, but, seriously, can't you just find out by having a normal conversation with me? Why the Dragnet routine? Seriously, I will tell you enything, probably without you asking. If you lewt me talk, I will talk the paint off the walls, and you'll still be interested.
Younger girls, conversely, have approached me a LOT in the last year or two. Maybe it's the grey creeping into my chin hairs.
More than once, while I've been laughing with a friend at the bar or a restaurant, a very obviously young girl has come up and boldly said, "You seem interesting. What's your name?" or "I like your laugh, what's so funny"
The problem comes when they (without fail) change their minds, which, I know, young girls are famous for, but really? I'm not going to pressure anyone into anything, but a couple of times it's almost like they want me to...I'd just rather let them go on their way and skip the headache. A 20 yr old Brazilian girl. Three 22 year olds whom I found enchanting, whom semed to find me the same, then changed their minds, two of whom changed them back, then back again... that's when I shut it down. One whom became much more attentive when I stopped bothering to text, ar make plans (which she had always stood me up for)
A friend of many years (and one many years my junior) has recently become a blessing to my lonely bed.
And we both seem happy to let it be a happy coincidence of time and circumstance. We seem perfectly sexually matched, as well as in temperament, pastimes and humor. And she's sowing some wild oats with her new liberation from the confines of matrimony. And I'm happy to provide her with all of these things. And when she's ready to move on, I'm ready for that as well.
I'm just hoping it's not too soon, because the idea of going back to the other is... lets say dismal