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genericname

Portland

Member Since 2004

Followers 1 Following 0

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Tuesday Aug 31, 2004

Aug 31, 2004
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Ok so i did some sprucing up on my friends list.... if you didnt wana be off it and still wanted to talk to me just lemme know and ill put you back on.
Mainly i took people off cause i just didnt freaking talk to them even when i went on their journals and replied to their posts and stuff.
Why bother keepin someone on a friend list if you are not even going to be replied to? waste of time and i already have enough aquiantances and too little friends...
So anyway thats that... *Stretches* guess im gonna go back to work and fight constant burning heart feeling type things that make me go "ouch! i wana snuggle with someone immediatly!"
Especially since most girls i know are too silent, and already have a billion other choices in guys including me if they even included me (which id rather not be included anyway because i dont like being in a competition hah)
Then again i did just meet some people and it hasnt been long and things take awhile to warm up... and im not EXPECTING anything romantic im just saying as a person who is taking a look from the outside of all this... that i still rush things too much and hope for too much too soon.
I only mention that to remind myself of why i should be relieved.. becuase this is how things work in a HEALTHY way and i need to get used to adjusting to that.
You start off like this... then you keep meeting people and at the very least you make friends.
Somewhere along the line you notice yourself blushing when you think of someone and NOT feeling ignored... or just another amongst their numbers of people.... they really make you feel like somebody...
Yes... i am trying to adjust to leaving things be until i notice that someone really treats me like im somebody and likes when i do the same back....
Someone who as time goes by i notice a warm smile develops on them every time i for example put my hand on their shoulder... or grab their hand to help them over something... someone who starts to blush as much as me.
OH! and slayer! i DO work out to help get my mind off stuff.... but the problem is... there are like a billion women at the gym all in short short short short shorts.... glistened with sweat and muscles toned *cries* such torture to my eyes! so mostly i try not to look and just stare forward.... because i guess im way more perverted than i have EVER cared to be...

anyway sorry for the long post but i certainly appreciate you reading it! take care!!!!!!
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
coldfreak:
i always hope for too much way to soon! then i get hurt... thanks for the inspirational lesson, tonight!
Sep 1, 2004
shadowslady:
definatlytongue still wanna be on here!! tongue
Sep 2, 2004

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