gaz123

Oh no! When I lost my grandparents I found it was really useful to talk to my friends, who let me cry for a little while and then changed the subject and made me smile, and sometimes we talked about funny things that my grandparents or their grandparents did and that made me feel a bit better. It works best I think if the people you talk to are not connected to the person you're talking about.

That may not work for you though, if you don't want to talk to people about it or if everyone you know was friends with this person. So in that case you just need to sit down and do something you enjoy like listening to some music you like, or even just carrying on going to work or whatever you do (when I lost my grandparents I went to school, although not many lessons, just to feel more normal).

And can I suggest something? Do not be a man about this. Do cry. Do be upset. Do deal with it. My dad bottles his grief up inside himself and then lets it out by screaming at his family. That's not wise. Just my personal experience, but I would suggest that it helps you to move on if you allow yourself to be upset, almost as if there is a certain amount of grief you have to suffer so you might as well get it over with now so you can move on.

Anyway I hope this helps and I hope you are coping. If you want to talk to someone I guess you can message me, I don't have anything better to do

Thanks for that, I've been on my own most of the day and it helped just to get some perspective. I don't bottle things up as such, I tend to do most of my crying when I'm alone. My wife got in from work a while ago and she said I seem much better now than I did this morning when I came in from work. There's a group of us that all belonged to the same pub team and we're meeting up tonight to share some stories so I'll probably do some proper healing then.

Thanks again for your comments, it really did help