garfish

I want to secure a job before I finish university, that way I don't have to spend three months sitting around waiting for life to restart after I graduate. I've done enough of that over the summer. In sorting out my CV I have found that there's a surprisingly fine line between selling yourself short and walking into the interview in speedos, winking at the interviewers and whispering 'you want me bad'.

Most places recommend that you start off with some cringeworthy sentence that supposedly sums you up, something like 'Detail orientated team player unafraid to ask relevant questions and apply initiative' or 'Confident individual eager to assume or differ leadership roles in the interests of project completeness'. Surely the people who read and evaluate these things for a living must know that it's absolute bollocks? I'm tempted to write 'Delicious multi-grain cereal that has been proven to lower cholesterol and keep your heart healthy' and see if I get any job offers.

How about, in future, all resumes / CVs / applications etc. have to be less than one hundred words and fit on something the size of a business card?