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garamondyo

Member Since 2012

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Monday Jan 09, 2006

Jan 9, 2006
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"THE SHINY BALLAD OF THE EXPURGATION OF THE DIGESTIVE BYWAYS OF GARAMOND THE NARROW" -

a fantasia in three acts and seven days

ACT ONE - The Mouth of the Beast
ACT TWO - The Belly of the Whale
ACT THREE - Sphincter, yo



ACT I, day 1
Today I begin! New Year! Clean ass!

The fast goes for seven days during which one drinks nothing but water flavored with fresh lemon juice, cayenne pepper, and maple syrup (Grade B).

Every morning starting on the fourth day I will drink a liter and a half of warm salt water which will shortly thereafter come thundering out my butt, hopefully taking along with it a massive amount of carcinogenic sedentary crap that otherwise will go nowhere and cause me untold miseries.

So today's the first day.
Of course I have a birthday party to go and not drink or eat at.
My tongue is so coated i think it might be heading up to Big Bear for some laughs, slopes and 'apres ski'.
I believe someone has driven a nail between my eyes, but I can't see it.
Still pretty bouncy though.

LET THE HEALLING BEGIN!
margot_dent:
ahhh my roommate tried to get me to do that last year.
my love of coffee and french fries prohibits it.
best of luck to you, though.
Jan 9, 2006

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