Today was really hard. Sundays were always our days to spend together. We'd go hiking or just lounge in bed or watch a movie or whatever. It was "our" day. Now it's "Damn, I have a day off and don't know what to do with myself."
Stolen from Miss
Koleeta
Things I will miss:
SPOILERS! (Click to view)
Him cuddled up behind me, an arm wrapped around my hip, belly or chest with the other arm under my head so I can hold his hand, and his stubbly face buried in my neck.
His lower lip. I love how he kisses me, how he's always kissed me just perfectly.
The way he would rub my hip because he likes the curve and to show that I'm his.
Him waiting at the bar for me to finish up with work.
Being able to text him, "I need you" and he'd be there, no questions asked.
How he'd stroke my hair back.
Forehead kisses.
Chutney, his cat, who was my lesbian lover.
How he smelled sticky sweet and his house did too.
Knowing anything remotely sexual would get him going (including a good kiss).
Calling him after I get off work and bitching about my day.
Our plans to travel together.
How he'd always say goodbye to me before leaving in the morning.
What I don't miss:
SPOILERS! (Click to view)
Him getting up at 5 a.m. to go to work. I hated that he couldn't just stay in bed five more minutes.
Some of the stupid shit he'd say (e.g. "We've had a good run, kid" in jest of us breaking up).
Him traveling for work (a week at a time).
Maybe this isn't for the best. Everyone seems to think we'll get back together. I got an e-mail from his dad today. He just CC'ed me on one he sent to RS. It hurts because they don't know yet (neither does my mom) and they were inviting us to visit in April.
My grandmother and aunt lectured me about how if he was the one, I'd swallow my pride, apologize and crawl back. I don't see that being a good option. Then gma tells me how she knew gpa was the one and left her fiance for him. I hate this. I just want to go back to how we were two weeks ago when we were so in love and everything seemed to be perfect for us.
Now it's "Damn, I have a day off and don't know what to do with myself."
This is me, anytime I'm not at work. Just one day at a time...
As much as I wish I had more people on the same boat as me when I'm down, I've been under the impression that as long as there is love, you can work just about anything out. Do you just need things you way for awhile or is this something that has no possible solutions?