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galaxy42

Ohio

Member Since 2006

Followers 50 Following 115

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Friday May 25, 2012

May 25, 2012
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Dear Portland,

It seems as though we finally need to clear up a thing or two about a thing or two...

First of all...this:

...is not parking. You seem to be under the misguided belief that it is since roughly 97% of your inhabitants seem dead set on doing it this way.

I know we are all "free spirits" here, railing against "The Man" or whatever you choose to call the imaginary outside force that has made your life miserable by trying to impose pesky "rules" on you, but sometimes... just sometimes, the rules actually make sense in terms of the greater good, which is, as I understand it, what you want. Yes?

SO... figure the fuck out how to park your goddamn cars. In a lot with 10 clearly marked spaces, you somehow make it impossible for more than 6 or 7 cars to park there. You are all assholes.

Second thing on my mind... now that the weather is nicer, if you are on a bike you must decide if you are traffic or pedestrian. You aren't both. And no matter how "right" you are in a given situation on the road, being right won't make you any less dead if I roll over top of you. I'm not anti-biker, I'm anti-asshole. Get your shit together, do what you are supposed to do, and everything will be fine. You don't own the fucking road. You SHARE it...

Lastly, unless you use Square with your smartphone, I can't give you any money in exchange for the service of bugging me and trying to make me feel sorry for you/guilty about me. I don't carry cash. Nice sign... you found a sturdy chunk of cardboard...kudos. Now fuck off.

Love,
-Uncle Galaxy

tiger:
Ha. I completely agree. Although, I park like an ass.
May 26, 2012

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