galaxy42

Grandma is in the hospital.
She's in pain...
She doesn't eat... she doesn't stay awake for longer than a minute at a time.

I don't think I'll ever hear her voice again, and I probably won't get a chance to tell her that I'm sorry for being a bratty kid (and, sometimes, a bratty adult). I visited her on Sunday... there wasn't much conversation. I held her hand a gave her a kiss before I left.

I kinda feel blank inside. I'm on the verge of tears and absolutely indifferent all at the same time. I really don't understand how that can happen. What the fuck happened to me? How can I be so cold?

I really don't know what's going on anymore... with me or anything else.

Somebody, save me...