We are leaving for Louisiana early so my buddy is shutting off the computer soon. I hope you all doing well and will keep my account open.
I am trying to take everything step by step.
I worry about my brother who will be going to Iraq about a month after me. He is only 19 and wants to go. Our parents are flipping out. I have been trying to perpare and hope I am ready, but I'm more concerned for my brother. He took our mother's death a lot harder than anyone and just started to recover. If something should happen to him, well, i don't know what I'm going to do.
After Iraq things in my life will take form and will know where to go.
Forming.....
Forming.....
Forming......
Its like watching the grass grow.
"The man who believes that the secrets of the world are forever hidden lives in mystery and fear. Superstition will drag him down. The rain will erode the deeds of his life. But that man who sets himself the task of singling out the thread of order from the tapestry will by decision alonehave taken charge of the world and it is only by such taking charge that he will effect a way to dictate the terms of his own fate." - Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy.
This has always facinated me.
Yeah mystery and darkness and secrets have its advantages, but the knowlege of knowing what was "unknown" makes it normal and known. No secrets. Especcially if noone else knows, the strentgh to control or manipulate the unkown thing is yours. I found though that through training that once someone loses the fear of dark can use it to thier advantage. In combatives here we were blind folded. most people moved slower and were too cautious, where I maintained my abilities dues to working out or doing things in dark places . By my knowlege of my ability of the dark I have an advantage. People are afraid of the unkown. If a person was able to unviel uncertainty and unkown, I can see where they can use it to dictate the terms of thier fate, yet I think that sometimes no matter what you do shit will happen and some things are inevitable. I guess it could matter to the degree that the shit hits.
Ok, my mind is burning up.
I hope I can write you guys soon and hope you are all well.
Take Care
I am trying to take everything step by step.
I worry about my brother who will be going to Iraq about a month after me. He is only 19 and wants to go. Our parents are flipping out. I have been trying to perpare and hope I am ready, but I'm more concerned for my brother. He took our mother's death a lot harder than anyone and just started to recover. If something should happen to him, well, i don't know what I'm going to do.
After Iraq things in my life will take form and will know where to go.
Forming.....
Forming.....
Forming......
Its like watching the grass grow.
"The man who believes that the secrets of the world are forever hidden lives in mystery and fear. Superstition will drag him down. The rain will erode the deeds of his life. But that man who sets himself the task of singling out the thread of order from the tapestry will by decision alonehave taken charge of the world and it is only by such taking charge that he will effect a way to dictate the terms of his own fate." - Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy.
This has always facinated me.
Yeah mystery and darkness and secrets have its advantages, but the knowlege of knowing what was "unknown" makes it normal and known. No secrets. Especcially if noone else knows, the strentgh to control or manipulate the unkown thing is yours. I found though that through training that once someone loses the fear of dark can use it to thier advantage. In combatives here we were blind folded. most people moved slower and were too cautious, where I maintained my abilities dues to working out or doing things in dark places . By my knowlege of my ability of the dark I have an advantage. People are afraid of the unkown. If a person was able to unviel uncertainty and unkown, I can see where they can use it to dictate the terms of thier fate, yet I think that sometimes no matter what you do shit will happen and some things are inevitable. I guess it could matter to the degree that the shit hits.
Ok, my mind is burning up.
I hope I can write you guys soon and hope you are all well.
Take Care
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well whatever.....the cat of my roomate hates me - he stands in front of my bed in the middle of the night trying to kill me I guess