freakqueen

no. i. am. not. dating. torquil.

we did kiss tuesday night. last night. fuck. my schedule's very fucked up because of that night. i don't know what day it is.

it was our first kiss!!! it probably would have been more magical/significant had he not bit my right breast later on. But he doesn't even remember doing it. [we talked like.. 4 times on the phone today. i'm going to miss him. immensely]. He bruised me, and broke skin. But he doesn't remember.
....if i get an infection from this....

my bmezine journal goes into detail about the night. but somehow, the details seem trivial. lots happened. Torquil said that he wanted last night to be his last memory of vancouver. It was that good.

i may never see him again. and i think i am perfectly ok with this. Because that is the history between myself and torquil. Maybe i can move with him. But, i have much more to lose.

- i am full of hopeful "maybe"s. and my logic and will to be great tramples them -

i went snowboarding today. let's not even discuss it. it's been over discussed and i'm sure megan would happily delete this entry if i go on and on about it.

the future holds great things. i feel this. and i think torquil does too. and that's why he's moving across the country on a whim. with no job or place to live waiting for him. he has phone numbers for hostels and phone numbers of business owners [friends of friends].

right now, there are certain jobs/things i want so badly... i would happily dye my hair brown and rid myself of piercings to get them.