June 12, 2007
Been driving around all day long. North Minneapolis, Fridley, Chanhassen, Minnetonka, Hopkins, St Louis Park and elsewhere. We deliver a lot. So I drive a lot. Its the graduation/wedding/party-for-the-helluvit time of year so we get a lot of rentals all over the cities. It...kinda sucks. I don't have to deal with phones or walk-in customers, which is nice. Instead I encounter them on the road. And with the way they drive, I think some of them want to kill me. They probably think the same of me.
I don't like to admit it, but I think I'm probably a very frustrating person to be on the road with. I hold a very high standard about how I think people should behave while driving. I believe a driver should be cautious (but not overly cautious), be reasonably close the speed limit or the speed of traffic (whichever is greater), and every driver should be polite and let people who have the brains to signal pass into their lane and not floor it to close any possible gap. Also, everybody should just get with the program and stay the hell out of my way. I actually believe in all of these rules and I do my best to adhere to them. That being said, I've been known to completely disregard all of them just to fulfill my goals, get where I need to go or just in a reaction to my growing frustration with the general population.
Over time I've become more and more critical of other people. In the last year or so I've began talking to and yelling at people in other cars. It came to a head last year when I wound up yelling at the top of my lungs at an old lady (70-80, with her window up...) to pull her head out of her ass. I looked over at my two unfortunate passengers, both 17 and said, "Well, I think that pretty much secures my place in hell." It's a nasty habit to try and break myself of. It ranks right up there with knuckle-cracking and cigarettes. The more I drive, the more I talk and the more I talk, the more I yell and the more I yell the more stressed I get and the more stressed I get the less I feel I have control over anything I do. I know it makes me an idiot, and an asshole. It is absolutely ridiculous. It's the only thing more lame about me than my dial-up connection. And maybe my $89 Target bike. Or those pants...
But I digress. I see those stickers that say "CALM DOWN" and think that's a pretty good idea, but fuck you for telling me what to do, you fucker now pick a lane.
Is this growing up?
No, this is reverting to a childish state and not keeping myself in check. Yes, this is the exact opposite of growing up. This yelling in cars, this is growing down. I'm just a little uptight. Which like saying that Mount Everest is a little tall, or that the Pacific is just a little bit of water. I find no respite between work, just trying to wind down before I go to bed, putting off bed then getting very little sleep and kicking myself in the morning while I make my way into the little house of rental spite.
Seriously, I'd prefer benefits and vacation if possible, but I'm totally open to finding anything starting sometime late in July. Fuck this place. It isn't for me and I do too much and stress too much to accomplish what feels like so little at the end of the day. It's good/bad that I work practically right next to the liquor store. 0 days without a drink. Must finish this chapter of my life. It has encompassed some growing up, my schooling and the tenure of my marriage. It is overdue. I used to think that a normal 9-5 job was for idiots, that sleeping in was preferable or even overnight shifts were better. I didn't mind working on Saturdays or Sundays if I had to. Just so long as it wasn't Joe Schmoe's standard Monday to Friday shift. Now I think to myself, fuck that. I want Joe's shift. If I'm sick, I want co-workers to call and have them be able to fill in for me. More than one. If you're out there, Joe, I'm coming for your job. Don't even think about stopping me. Just get up outta that seat and let me at some T.P.S. reports.
Been driving around all day long. North Minneapolis, Fridley, Chanhassen, Minnetonka, Hopkins, St Louis Park and elsewhere. We deliver a lot. So I drive a lot. Its the graduation/wedding/party-for-the-helluvit time of year so we get a lot of rentals all over the cities. It...kinda sucks. I don't have to deal with phones or walk-in customers, which is nice. Instead I encounter them on the road. And with the way they drive, I think some of them want to kill me. They probably think the same of me.
I don't like to admit it, but I think I'm probably a very frustrating person to be on the road with. I hold a very high standard about how I think people should behave while driving. I believe a driver should be cautious (but not overly cautious), be reasonably close the speed limit or the speed of traffic (whichever is greater), and every driver should be polite and let people who have the brains to signal pass into their lane and not floor it to close any possible gap. Also, everybody should just get with the program and stay the hell out of my way. I actually believe in all of these rules and I do my best to adhere to them. That being said, I've been known to completely disregard all of them just to fulfill my goals, get where I need to go or just in a reaction to my growing frustration with the general population.
Over time I've become more and more critical of other people. In the last year or so I've began talking to and yelling at people in other cars. It came to a head last year when I wound up yelling at the top of my lungs at an old lady (70-80, with her window up...) to pull her head out of her ass. I looked over at my two unfortunate passengers, both 17 and said, "Well, I think that pretty much secures my place in hell." It's a nasty habit to try and break myself of. It ranks right up there with knuckle-cracking and cigarettes. The more I drive, the more I talk and the more I talk, the more I yell and the more I yell the more stressed I get and the more stressed I get the less I feel I have control over anything I do. I know it makes me an idiot, and an asshole. It is absolutely ridiculous. It's the only thing more lame about me than my dial-up connection. And maybe my $89 Target bike. Or those pants...
But I digress. I see those stickers that say "CALM DOWN" and think that's a pretty good idea, but fuck you for telling me what to do, you fucker now pick a lane.
Is this growing up?
No, this is reverting to a childish state and not keeping myself in check. Yes, this is the exact opposite of growing up. This yelling in cars, this is growing down. I'm just a little uptight. Which like saying that Mount Everest is a little tall, or that the Pacific is just a little bit of water. I find no respite between work, just trying to wind down before I go to bed, putting off bed then getting very little sleep and kicking myself in the morning while I make my way into the little house of rental spite.
Seriously, I'd prefer benefits and vacation if possible, but I'm totally open to finding anything starting sometime late in July. Fuck this place. It isn't for me and I do too much and stress too much to accomplish what feels like so little at the end of the day. It's good/bad that I work practically right next to the liquor store. 0 days without a drink. Must finish this chapter of my life. It has encompassed some growing up, my schooling and the tenure of my marriage. It is overdue. I used to think that a normal 9-5 job was for idiots, that sleeping in was preferable or even overnight shifts were better. I didn't mind working on Saturdays or Sundays if I had to. Just so long as it wasn't Joe Schmoe's standard Monday to Friday shift. Now I think to myself, fuck that. I want Joe's shift. If I'm sick, I want co-workers to call and have them be able to fill in for me. More than one. If you're out there, Joe, I'm coming for your job. Don't even think about stopping me. Just get up outta that seat and let me at some T.P.S. reports.
sindri:
your comment on the set was awesome! thanks for making me smile!