I'm feeling somewhat weak today-- yesterday i went to my friend's wedding and i don't remember anything between seeing the bride&groom off in their truck right before running after one of the last glasses of champagne, and waking up the next morning at 3am in my bed, still wearing my dress and nylons and everything. I think i had one huge martini and like a half dozen plastic glasses of champagne, and a few beers before that; vomitted green weirdness in the toilet when i woke up this morning. still on the rag, feeling kinda mentally airy and light-- kinda tingly in my fingers and --yes, lightheaded, that's it--- yuck 
clawed at the space beside me in the bed wishing for someone in particular-- or no one in particular-- some mornings i do that-- grope at the empty space for someone to kiss at-- to something... guess that's called being horny... guess it happens to the best of us... sadly imagine sheets turning into human skin and limbs... hold onto pillows like they were a torso... so rarely these days is that space next to me occupied; the one i imagine most being far, far away and most likely likewise occupied for real... imagination turns into a brittle landscape, lonely towards an image of one reclined forever in the sheets; deep inside, residing there forever as a memory does, recalled to mind but never again into the void they left when they departed from my side...
the space is larger and larger as the heart expands, for the one who kept it full for such a brief eternity...
...all that before puking green goo into the porcelian altar. yow what a morning.
clawed at the space beside me in the bed wishing for someone in particular-- or no one in particular-- some mornings i do that-- grope at the empty space for someone to kiss at-- to something... guess that's called being horny... guess it happens to the best of us... sadly imagine sheets turning into human skin and limbs... hold onto pillows like they were a torso... so rarely these days is that space next to me occupied; the one i imagine most being far, far away and most likely likewise occupied for real... imagination turns into a brittle landscape, lonely towards an image of one reclined forever in the sheets; deep inside, residing there forever as a memory does, recalled to mind but never again into the void they left when they departed from my side...
the space is larger and larger as the heart expands, for the one who kept it full for such a brief eternity...
...all that before puking green goo into the porcelian altar. yow what a morning.
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
Sorry to hear about the sickage, I prefer getting not quite to that point in the evening. My Saturday went on until after 5am, and netted out with me crashing on a couch that was a good two feet shorter than what would pass for comfortable...
odi omnes
I'm surprised and sorry to hear that you are so lonely. You need to make your way down here more often! Or maybe your good ol buddy homewrecker should make a trip up your way for once. In any case, you sound like you could use some company.
Take care of yourself! Hope to see you again sometime soon.