I've been trying to eat more healthy, but i'm at a disadvantage cause that kinda requires having healthy things to eat around the house lol--- this morning i woke up feeling dizzy and exhausted, first day of the period and all-- i had to call my photographer and cancel today's appointment, i was just feeling like i wouldn't do well to work today-- i still kinda feel guilty about that tho--- i had enough energy to drive myself to starbucks and at least make good of all the internet-related work i've gotta do... i BADLY need a new form of organization, or ANY form of organization at all; all my different projects are each generating so much paperwork and records and resources and materials and they're all swarming around my brain and confusing the hell outta me-- it's getting to the point where i might need to take a class or buy software or something to fucking get all my different files straight... but then, my life right now has so many disorganized directions at the moment, due largely to me not having any clue what, overall, it is i really want to do most... i just have a long, long list of things i want to do... to be... to get done before i'm too old to do any of them... and none of them is really in front of any other at the moment... which just makes my head spin...
oh, on another note; i finally got some of the purses i've been making into WASTELAND on MELROSE! you know, that way pricy consignment store with the awesome manniquins in the window? They took 4 of my purses; if you go in there, they're the ones that say "RUSTIC BLOOD" on them-- they're red vintage purses with paintings of bleeding hearts and cats and things on them--- oh, and one of the 4 will be of a different 'look' and say "KATTER" on it-- which -confusingly- is a different of my pseudo-companies/identities, technically separate from RUSTIC but being put out by me simultaneously as a slightly different style of merchandise...
gasp!! now you see what i mean? man, i confuse myself even trying to describe just a *few* of the things i'm doing lol ... At the moment, i've got so many things going that i'm looking for the one that *survives* the test of time to be the ones that i wind up sticking to...
..and i still dont have a website so i can show you any of this stuff
silly me... well, i might not even be able to *do* one for this project; the purses are flying outta my hands and onto store shelves so fast these days, i hardly have anything left that i could sell on the web... it would all be "and this one is currently in this-n-that store and this one is over at this-and-that place..." yeah, you know...
oh, on another note; i finally got some of the purses i've been making into WASTELAND on MELROSE! you know, that way pricy consignment store with the awesome manniquins in the window? They took 4 of my purses; if you go in there, they're the ones that say "RUSTIC BLOOD" on them-- they're red vintage purses with paintings of bleeding hearts and cats and things on them--- oh, and one of the 4 will be of a different 'look' and say "KATTER" on it-- which -confusingly- is a different of my pseudo-companies/identities, technically separate from RUSTIC but being put out by me simultaneously as a slightly different style of merchandise...
gasp!! now you see what i mean? man, i confuse myself even trying to describe just a *few* of the things i'm doing lol ... At the moment, i've got so many things going that i'm looking for the one that *survives* the test of time to be the ones that i wind up sticking to...
..and i still dont have a website so i can show you any of this stuff
silly me... well, i might not even be able to *do* one for this project; the purses are flying outta my hands and onto store shelves so fast these days, i hardly have anything left that i could sell on the web... it would all be "and this one is currently in this-n-that store and this one is over at this-and-that place..." yeah, you know...
I believe all this is a combination of having lost a few pints of blood into the toilet over the last 18 hours, and having poured a couple glasses of wine into the slightly-emptier container of my body last night-- and maybe a little on the stress and all the usual-- but also i haven't been eating very well, despite my best efforts... i was trying to increase the amount of veggies and grains i was eating for a few days, for a while; and then one day i opened up the fridge and saw a big box of KFC in there and went basically bonkers and consumed the last 3 legs in there; thinking to myself "never NEVER be a vegiterian" all the while... I had a huge craving for milk products all of a sudden, that happened the following day... I dunno what it is about eating with me all of a sudden: part of it is the thought of my potentially being a model, i think-- that kinda fucks with my head... whenever i visit my fam back in p-ville i of course eat alot more than here-- i don't usually get even 2 meals a day here and over there i have 3... my housemate said he thought i gained a few pounds when i returned from there last-- and a part of me kinda freaked-- i don't think i would have if i wasn't considering this career-- but i do believe that in the few interceeding weeks i've probably lost whatever weight i'd gained in those 7 or 8 days in p-ville... and that hasn't been that long of a time... i dunno, all this kinda stuff is confusing; when i was just a student/comic-book-artist-wannabe it was ok to eat like a bachelor cause i couldn't cook for crap, but now all of a sudden i'm thinking about this kinda stuff, now that i've got pseudo-businesses and a possible modelling thing going... but everything only at the "potential" stage...
...also (not to keep rambling, but i assume you can just stop reading whenever you're done and tired of it) part of my purse business has got me hooked up with this artist co-op kind of group-- one branch of my thing is working through them, and they're all huge healthy-eating-vegan-macro-biotic-yoga people, and so we spend a lot, and i mean a LOT of time talking about cooking, nutrition, stuff like that... and they kinda got me thinking... they gave me these books about "macrobiotic" and stuff... you know how you start re-considering stuff when someone hands you literature and it sounds saavy and intelligent... ah, now i've satisfied my desire to ramble and i'll let you go