fortysix_and_two

OUCH!

Well, today was interesting. Myself and my roomies were chilling outside as we grilled some steaks, when the leg of the grill came off and it tipped... right toward their two year old son. I knocked it aside the only way I could, from that angle. I shoved my hand into the flaming coals, hit grill bottom, and flung the thing across the yard....
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Wish I could find what I'm looking for...
Makes it difficult when I don't know what it is or what it's supposed to do. Something broke inside me earlier this year, and I miss it terribly, but I can't recall what it is or how it felt.

Well, I do remember somewhat. It felt like 'home'. It felt like 'safe'. It felt like 'me'. And...
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After getting cut down to 12 hours a week at my job, I put my resume on Monster.com, and got a call the next day from Primerica, wanting to interview me! YAY! Wish me luck!

**UPDATE**

Well, no job... would cost me $199 to get a license to sell insurance... *sigh*

"But I, being poor, have only my dreams; I have spread my dreams under your feet; Tread softly because you tread on my dreams."

Yeats

You have crushed my dreams casually beneath your feet.

On a lighter note, Eddie Izzard is a fucking comedic GENIUS! I just spent the last hour laying on the floor holding my sides trying to breathe.

Well, found out what both my mother and I have.

Mom: a form of cancer that's commonly found in black male children... spreads fast, but very susceptible to chemo. Estimated chance of survival: 90%

Me: Pinkeye. Estimated chance of annoyance: 100%

Sad thing is, I can't stand ANYTHING to touch my eye... and now I have to give myself eyedrops four times a day. Which...
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Long Days

Spent the last few days at a friend's house... I had to run, things got too intense and I needed some sort of insulation. Spent a day blind, due to some sort of eye virus I had. Was actually quite interesting, using my other senses to function. Spent the day in meditation, focused healing energies into my eyes... and this morning I could...
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I have word about my mother.

She has lymphoma. Not sure if it's Hodgekins or not. We find that out Monday.

Prognosis: slim to no chance.

Went and saw Punisher. AWESOME movie.

I've taken ill, for the first time this year. I hate being sick. But I'm gonna tough it out, work open to close, get my check, and go to the fetish bar and have me some fun anyway.

I fucking love the person who wrote this.

Ode to the Nice Guys

Describes what I do to a "T". I...
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Crisis.

Mom's in the hospital. Apparently, the medicine she was taking to treat a condition has caused one, where the stomach acid is sent into the pancreas instead. Basically, she's digesting herself, and the docs can't do shit to stop it.

Prednisone information

Side effects

I forgot what it was like to hate... now I remember. First they cook my brain with ritalin and prozac...
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It's finally here!

I have a new photoset coming up. Velvet_night and I went to Whetstone Park, and walked through the woods to the Park of Roses. Sounds like a lovely place for a set, right?

Wrong. The roses aren't in bloom yet.

BUT! We did see some lovely trees, and did the sit with those. This set WILL be including full nudity, but we...
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