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forge

Somwhere you never heard of. (YES my real Name is KIM)

Member Since 2004

Followers 8 Following 25

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Saturday Oct 09, 2004

Oct 8, 2004
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Random memories..

Two shiny nickels and a half pack of smokes.

That was the extent of what my pockets held not counting lint and wallet that was devoid of cash. My lighter seemed to have disappeared since leaving the Hill Street coffee house. This was a sad occurrence but since it was not my Zippo I did not hold a grudge.
It was chilly and overcast as I walked down Hwy 101. I really had no where to be and no where to go. I did not feel that I needed to be anywhere I just liked to wander. I did not own a car in those days even though I was 24 years old. At that point in my life I was content with the world and the world seemed to be content with me.

I walked the 101 every day for hours and never knew what would happen on any given day. Each time I set out it was with a sense of anticipation of what the day would bring. I felt that by just wandering I could somehow find the answers to why people are the way they are and in some small way find how I fit in to this puzzle. I can honestly say that I did find myself on these walks and met people who changed my life.
I saw things that have been etched into my mind as surely as the ink on my skin.

I met mothers living in filth their children neglected and ill treated while they sought forgetfulness and freedom in the arms of a pipe or needle. These I did what I could for and spent many night then and now regretting what I could not.

I met a girl once who had the face of an angel. This angel had matted hair and dirty clothes. Asking for change I gave what I had and offered coffee. Taking my change she sneered banishing the angel and declined the coffee.

On one of these walks I met the first women to ever capture my heart. Her smile was the sun and her heart was my salvation. Later on the walk of life she left me battered and empty but not beaten.

I met people who I have called friend. People who bring a smile to my face all these years later with nothing but memory to abide.

I look at my life now and wonder at the change. I live in a different world now one filled with deadlines and expectations. It is a world that has lost clarity becoming somehow less fulfilling. I think I am no longer content with the world nor it with me. I think always needing to be somewhere and knowing where I need to be is maybe not such a good thing.

It is late so I typed what was in my head.

It is easy to descend into hell night or day.
The gates of dark death stand open wide.
But to retrace ones steps to the open air.
There lies the task the rub.
-Virgil
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
amelia:
I love you honey!
Oct 10, 2004
hellynn:
miao!!
Oct 11, 2004

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