foreverxbroken

well... after going to the "girl doctor" they called me back yesterday with the results of the pap. originally i had gone because something was not right and i wanted to find out what was going on.

well they called me back yesterday. my pap came back abnormal and tey found some abnormal cells. they stressed to me that it was extremely important to come back in and that they could not discuss it further over the telephone. that i would have to speak to the doctor about it.

i guess the reason this scares me so much is because ive known for some time that cancer runs int he family. all my aunts and my mother have all had hysterectomys due to ovarian/uterine/cervical cancer.

i knew i was at an extremely high risk... but i never believed it would ever happent o me.

so now i just pray to God that htis isnt the beginning of history repeating itself.

maybe it will be nothing. unfortunatly with the family history theres not much of a chance its nothing.

i dont know if ive ever really been this scared ever.


on a lighter note that i probably shouldnt even think about- i wonder if its ok to have sex. i guess as long as im not in pain it should be alright. hmm