flit

the excitement has died down and I'm left feeling lethargic and unamused.

mainly I'm going into cigarette withdrawl
AGAIN!

why can I just leave those repugnant things be?
why do I keep putting myself (and the people around me) through this?

*sigh*
I'm disappointed in myself for my lack of self-restraint...
pissed that it's so easily accessible...
outraged that I would do this to myself over and over

Dusti put it best when she said it's kind of like an abused women returning to her tormentor
and that shit makes me sick!
but here I am
in an all too familiar place... pulling out my hair...
suggestions?!?