flatblack

Wanna know what my favorite part of Christmas is? It's the part where they keep a tree that was cut down a month ago in their living room. Then they string the old electrical wires all over it and put about eight plugs into one outlet. For kindling, they put a bunch of cardboard and paper under the tree. Then they have a fire in the nearby fireplace and light candles all over the room.

I have this theory that this part of the tradition was started as repentance for 20 centuries of burning people at the stake.