fishlips

So i've been back on for a couple of days now and i'm already back into the habit of only updating when something bad happens

Digger died yesterday morning
i really don't want to go into exactly how cause even i'm not sure, just that it was completely unexpected and sudden. he wasn't sick he wasn't old, not even 2 years.
i ok as long as i'm distracted but as i a get a moment alone esp. in my apt. i can't stop thinking about how much this completely shatters things. digger was one cat in a million not shy at all, when ever i was doing something in my place he always there not more than three feet away

it tears me when think about how he'll never be waiting by the door when i come home from work and run into and snoop around the hallway, he go into the tub and chase his tail, jump onto my lap and rub his head against me or roll on his back so i can rub his belly or play with his sister Jude or sleep next me on my bed which he did every night
i do want to go to sleep because i'm afraid i'll dream about and have to wake up and remember that he's gone