What inspired me to become a hopeful?
Acceptance.
All of my life I've always been drawn to the crazy hair, the tattoos, the piercings, all of it. So when I finally had a job of my own, I was able to spend my money on what I wanted, and I began my transformation. I got my first tattoo when I was 18, I haven't stopped since. But, once I started getting the tattoos I wanted, the clothes I want, the hair I wanted, I felt a shift take place. People started looking at me differently. I could see the judgement on their faces. I was always really confused though. I'd always think 'Why are they staring at me like that? Why am I being judged for being who I am?'
I felt very alone. Isolated almost. And then I started finding out more about the alternative lifestyle, and through that is how I found Suicide Girls. I started looking things up, scrolling through pictures, and saw that they all were like me. I suddenly felt like I actually belonged somewhere. I didn't feel like I would be judged.
I was always very self-conscious of myself, I had very low self-esteem. I never in my life dreamed I would be doing anything like this. I had a wonderful friend help me take the plunge into all of this though, and honestly, it's probably one of the best ideas I've had in a long time. I haven't felt so accepted and welcomed into a group ever, it's such a lovely feeling.
I can't wait to see where this journey will take me though.
