ferfachu5000

Lorna and Grace (and sometimes HANS!) are coming tomorrow! I love these girls so much. Lorna is my idol and she is so brilliant inside and out it makes me cry. Grace is, like her name suggest, graceful in her simplicity and innocence. I really look up to these guys and they inspire me to take things less seriously.
Having them here will be so nice for a week. We plan to go to Portland too and I'm excited to see Loribear and perhaps a Bob sighting, that is if he's allowed.

I'm excited, but then, things that remind me of my old life have a tendency to make me nostalgic for when things were simpler, when we were invincible, and when i had a better idea of what was going on in my little mind.

I have a yearning to go back in time, and although i'm aware its impossible, i think the desire comes from my fear of the future. So many people I love have died this year and it makes me realize that the future is going to hurt. Furthermore, it makes me subconsciously want to push away my friends and family, turn them away because who knows if they'll be next? I know its a terrible way to live, but I guess, deep down, its my defense. I keep telling people the trauma in my life has helped me appreciate what I have and who I care about... but its easy to say, I'm not sure its what's really going on though. Whoa. That was pretty deep, even for me.

My profile pic makes my cheek look bull-dogish.