I feel like I want to write here again.
Funny, but every time I'm depressed I write blogs in english.
I've been havin a probably typical teenage (yes, i consider myself teenage) issues. You know, thoughts about life and death and so on... the worth case ever.
It's just that... I have pretty much everything. I quit my university and now I'm trying to get in a new one, which I choose, which I like, not the one my family made me go to.
I have a loving and supportive boyfriend. We've known each other since our 1st year at school (since we were 7 years old, my god!) and we recently celebrated our 6 months together. But it still feels like we've been together forever, in a good way. We both try not to be selfish (his mother is a... psycologist? terepist? not sure about the correct word), we understand each other perfictly... lately there's been some tiny problems but that's only because he's having exams, sleeps for like 1 hour a day, i study.. and etc. It's ok in general.
I look the way I want to now. I stopped caring about my weight and I feel I'm perfect even wih extra kilos on my belly.
I have great interesting friends.
I have everything I ever wanted.. I don't feel like I have a goal in life anymore..
Everything seems worthless now because I'll die anyway. It's a shame to say that, but I don't want to die. I enjoy my life so much... I just can't believe it might end someday.
I know that for those who have problems in life these words probably sound very stupid... She has everything andshe complains, what a bitch!
Don't get me wrong, I enjoy life. I'm incredibly thankfull that I have it.
It's probably because I'm so lonely at home... I go to bed and I feel so alone and forgotten... I have nightmares, I can't study... stuff like that.
I sure hope it's just a matter of time... I'll be strong, I'll be fine.
After all, I can always go to Twlly's blog and get a load of positive energy, she's so inspiring. =)
Anyways, he are a few pics so you won't forget how I look.
p.s. sorry if i made many mistakes, i had no language practice for a looong time...
Warning! lots of pics!!
Funny, but every time I'm depressed I write blogs in english.
I've been havin a probably typical teenage (yes, i consider myself teenage) issues. You know, thoughts about life and death and so on... the worth case ever.
It's just that... I have pretty much everything. I quit my university and now I'm trying to get in a new one, which I choose, which I like, not the one my family made me go to.
I have a loving and supportive boyfriend. We've known each other since our 1st year at school (since we were 7 years old, my god!) and we recently celebrated our 6 months together. But it still feels like we've been together forever, in a good way. We both try not to be selfish (his mother is a... psycologist? terepist? not sure about the correct word), we understand each other perfictly... lately there's been some tiny problems but that's only because he's having exams, sleeps for like 1 hour a day, i study.. and etc. It's ok in general.
I look the way I want to now. I stopped caring about my weight and I feel I'm perfect even wih extra kilos on my belly.
I have great interesting friends.
I have everything I ever wanted.. I don't feel like I have a goal in life anymore..
Everything seems worthless now because I'll die anyway. It's a shame to say that, but I don't want to die. I enjoy my life so much... I just can't believe it might end someday.
I know that for those who have problems in life these words probably sound very stupid... She has everything andshe complains, what a bitch!
Don't get me wrong, I enjoy life. I'm incredibly thankfull that I have it.
It's probably because I'm so lonely at home... I go to bed and I feel so alone and forgotten... I have nightmares, I can't study... stuff like that.
I sure hope it's just a matter of time... I'll be strong, I'll be fine.
After all, I can always go to Twlly's blog and get a load of positive energy, she's so inspiring. =)
Anyways, he are a few pics so you won't forget how I look.
p.s. sorry if i made many mistakes, i had no language practice for a looong time...
Warning! lots of pics!!
getting this off my chest kinda made me feel a little bit better.
thank you for watching.
it will past just give it time
My X g.f. just got back from Moscow
good luck on your cooking