febee

i remember a feeling of hands running over my body with such a gentle force. that look, that feeling. I miss being with someone. not just fucking but really being with someone. when there is this rythum to your moves, like you have the other person in your soul yeah theres alot to miss.
maybe tonights my night to whine. to sit and stew in my memories, hell its friday. good fun. some guy from the bar called to invite me to a club tonight. I hope he doesnt think i am blowing him off. I just got off work late and didnt have a soul to go with. we went out last night. we went to some crappy college bar full of jerks, hell they all could have been nice i was just in a bad mood. I didnt want to be there. it was my sisters choice. i did talk to a few people. yeah i did. i am just shy. i think maybe i can be a little bit to standoffish. but it really wasnt my element. sure i enjoy the next underage drinking bar as much as the next girl. underage girls + over age men. just a fun place. Jessica wanted to dance so we went there.
So after my sister got tanked off very little acohol, we went to a different place. called the compound. i like it there. I feel like i fit in. unfortunetly jessica decided to get rather sick in there bathroom. she is lucky that they are friends with the owners. not to mention she turned into a cruel bitch. she apologized tonight after another girl told her just how cruel she was. I was just ready to leave.
I dont think today was one of those great days. but there was a factor that made it a really good day. same factor that brought prior memories back but it made me happy. the fact worked fucked up my pay made me angry. I really dont have much for the next week it sucks. I cant buy that bed so yeah i am still sharing. actually not tonight. I decided to sleep on the couch. I figure we need a little space. I really hope they fix this soon.