Ok, so here's the deal. After about a month of knowing this has been coming, my dad goes under the knife on Wednesday. I'm real fucking scared. My life has become nothing more than a cycle of me waking up, doing whatever makes the time pass, then drinking myself out of/further into my depression and fear and hatred of things around me, even though I...
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Big update about my bullshit coming sometime soon hopefully...maybe after a nap....
i'm drunk
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deerailed:
So am I. Word, brotha, WORD.
:: takes another swig ::
:: takes another swig ::
saida:
IM NOT CHEATING.. well not really.. i never claimed that pic was Krown!! LOL Im not guilty!! 
I wanna get drunk toooooooooooooooooooooo
I wanna get drunk toooooooooooooooooooooo
Aaron goes through withdrawl: Day one.
deerailed:
Withdrawl? From?
Remember: Winners never quit!
(kidding, kidding...)
Remember: Winners never quit!
(kidding, kidding...)
let the self destruction continue...
21 guns, a box made of pine, letter from the government sealed and signed, delivered fedreal express on your mothers doorstep...
Man, I just can't get over the fact that some bad shit is going to happen to me real fucking soon. I'd say i'm parinoid, but i might be right...
saida:
Whats wrong.. I dont like all of these negative posts.. whats going on? Are you alright? 
So that last post....I suck, bad. Anyways, I don't want human contact. Ever again. I'm going to bed.
I was going through some old papers and I found this thing I wrote while drinking coffee far too late at night about a year ago. Some things don't change....
It's really strange how people have to fight to get close to me. Not fight wind resistance, or other people or something of matter. They have to fight me. Not just fight the me that...
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It's really strange how people have to fight to get close to me. Not fight wind resistance, or other people or something of matter. They have to fight me. Not just fight the me that...
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Let's all pretend that life is good for a few hours...
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deerailed:
sorry, system overload.
Here's the error message:
OVERFLOW EXCEPTION IN 0xBF3C0
Invalid syntax near 'happiness'
Please refer to the following stack dump for further information
(-- Custom Errors Log - Stack Trace +64
in (/ironic/webapp1/life.aspx) -32
(--!!
[Edited on May 17, 2004 3:08PM]
Here's the error message:
OVERFLOW EXCEPTION IN 0xBF3C0
Invalid syntax near 'happiness'
Please refer to the following stack dump for further information
(-- Custom Errors Log - Stack Trace +64
in (/ironic/webapp1/life.aspx) -32
(--!!
[Edited on May 17, 2004 3:08PM]
jade:
Hey you! Back from Toronto. You should have gone, it was a good time. Will you come to SGB Buffalo? Let's not pretend life is great. Let's make life great for a while. I'm in a very optimistic mood right now...can you tell? 
In relation to something I just read in Saida's journal, I saw a guy the other day that had on a shirt which read something like "for every animal you don't eat, I'm going to eat three!" I found this funny...
saida:
LOL... hahahahahahahahaha best shit ever!!!!!!!!! 
deerailed:
:: continues chewing on brisket while nodding ::
Let's hear it for the people who hate themselves...go, team, go
it was all about how things are exactly how they are supposed to be..
we are not in any situation we are not meant to be in.
we are here to learn..
and no parent ever wants to see their son sad..
so keep your chin up for your Dad. . Im sure he needs it as much as you do..
you rule.. so dont let negative people and reality bring you down..
we get beat up all the time in life... but we always recover
xoxoxox
Try not to stress about your dad...just be there for him if you can...will he need to stay in the hospital or is it an outpatient type thing?
And you, yes you, you miserable bastard
Buck up buttercup!