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fallfromgrace

Westland, MI.

Member Since 2004

Followers 44 Following 47

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Saturday Jan 01, 2005

Dec 31, 2004
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So this is the new year, and I don't feel any different
The clanking of crystal, explosions off in the distance
So this is the new year, and I have no resolutions
It's self-assigned penance for problems with easy solutions.

I only remember one new years eve. I was in high school, and there was a party my senior year, and for some reason my parents let me go. I was extremely uncomfortable, and I didn't dance or do anything else that was fun.

when the clock struck midnight, the girls and guys exchanged pecks on the cheek. the girl I'd had a crush on all through high school came up to me and kissed me on the cheek.

I remember it feeling cheap and tawdry.

Nowadays, when something is memorable to me, it's because the memory is full of pain. I guess that's why I don't like celebrating, because I'm endlessly let down and always expecting the worst from the best of our days.

My lower lip can't keep moisture, so it's all cracked and peeling. I feel gross.

My friend told me that every day is special. If every day is special, then each day's uniqueness is intrinsically the same. there are no better or worse days, only different days. To differ in nothing is to have no difference at all.

I need new emo.


Questions:

1. what do you have to live for? What grand design or majestic purpose justfies your existance? Beyond your own hubris and hedonism, what validates your life? Should our lives need affirmation at all?

2. What party favors (bubbles, poppers, those blow whistles that inflate, etc) did you use this New Years Eve, if any?

3. When you go to the state fair, which food booth do you absolutely have to hit up? which ride or exhibit? In Michigian, I always liked the cow made out of butter.

4. Transformers or Go-bots?

And it's strange, but they're all basically the same, so I don't ask names anymore.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
vixenreincarnate:
First off, thanks for the encouragement with my "situation" at hand. It really does help to get all the encouragement I can, seeing as I keep second guessing this. At this point though, my mind is made up - I hope*...oh no, here she goes again....
Sorry about your lack of festivity for the new year. I think it has kind of lost all of it's hype on my holiday list but it was nice spending it with the kids I was watching becuase it was the first time they got to stay up for it...and it was something I'll remember and hopefully they will too.
1. I have no idea! And I have a strong dislike for people who babble on about thier goals, etc because usually they are materialistic. With growing up I've decided that the only affirmation our lives need is from within, not the outside world. Corny, but true.
2. No party favors, just some ginger ale and kisses from the boys I watch. One of whom asked me to marry him.....too bad he's only 6.
3. Maple snow cones. I think it's a new york thing. And kettle corn. Always end up on the huge ferris wheel, but I'm not big on rides other than that. No fave exhibits, but I always love watching the performers that they have.
4. I was the only girl that I know to have any transformers and I didn't have any gobots. Transformers win on this one. miao!!
Jan 1, 2005
awryx:
i hope things look up for u.
i have anger yep, but im going to try to deal with it now.
hope u feel better about the each day being special. it's quite true. smile
1. what do you have to live for? What grand design or majestic purpose justfies your existance? Beyond your own hubris and hedonism, what validates your life? Should our lives need affirmation at all?

- i live to do what i want. i live to find people who shares a certain love in life as i do. smile

2. What party favors (bubbles, poppers, those blow whistles that inflate, etc) did you use this New Years Eve, if any?
- i didnt use anything, all i had was a half filled cup of pepsi haha.

3. When you go to the state fair, which food booth do you absolutely have to hit up? which ride or exhibit? In Michigian, I always liked the cow made out of butter.
- ooh ive never been to a state fair....

4. Transformers or Go-bots? - transformers, i used to llike em. ooo aaa

take care smile
Jan 1, 2005

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