WARNING- Misery-filled stream-of-consciousness-type entry
...and that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I gave up drinking.
*sigh*
Well, the works' Summer Party was last night. Once again, I proved that I'm one of lifes' born teetotallers. Not because I don't enjoy drinking but largely due to the way I behave once inebriated. I have a tendency to become aggressive, start fights and generally upset the people I'm with. As of mid last year, I swore off alcohol and can honestly say I don't regret it. I used to drink rather a lot and would regularly finish an evening with my head down a loo somewhere, watching my last meal go past my eyes a second time. Unfortunately, my behaviour (and an aggravating tendency to wake up next to people I really shouldn't) caused me _many_ problems. Asha and a few other members who knew me back then will know what I mean.
Anyway, last night was a free bar. Normally, I wouldn't drink alcohol and would just stick to coke, red bull etc however being completely broke I couldn't afford my usual substances (substituted for drinking a while back) so fell back on getting pissed.
And get pissed I did.
Massively.
I currently am sporting a few trophies from the evening- namely a _MOTHERFUCKER_ of a hangover and what may be a broken knuckle (I'll know when the swelling goes down) on my right hand. My hand is rather a mess (meaning this is taking bloody ages to type) but the good news is that I _think_ (I'm not sure- my memory when drinking is patchy at best) I hit something, rather than someone. I haven't had any irate phonecalls telling me what I cunt I was (yet, anyway). Not quite sure why I was quite so fucked off last night (an observation made by a few friends- they said I was cheesed off but no-one knew why) but I can hazard a guess-
In keeping with my tendency to go for girls with boyfriends, I've become scarily enamored with one of the girls from work. Have in fact liked her for the better part of six months, which for me is frankly astonishing, as I have the attention span of a goldfish. Anyways, said young lady was there last night, looking great, as always (sickening, isn't it?). What put my back up, was upon going back to my hotel room, having been a good boy all night and not put the moves on her, wandering in to find one of my mates having sex with her, then having to listen to it happening in the next room for the better part of an hour.
This made me grumpy.
Some choice words were had with so-called friend this morning, which didn't come to blows (but was a close-run thing). But hey, life's full of disappointments. *wry smile*
Though I must confess to having become bored of being single. It's been a very long time since I last went out with anyone (rather than one-night standing it) and I'm pretty sure I'm back to a point where the thought of being in a relationship doesn't scare the shit outta me. Last couple of girlfriends fell through largely due to my apparent inability to deal with monogamy. Though, again those events stemmed from my drinking problems so hopefully shouldn't be an issue anymore. So, the hunt's on- I just have to find someone who measures up to my unrealistically high standards. To clarify, a lot of my friends tell me I'm too goddamn picky when it comes to women. I would normally disagree but can see their point when, looking back, I've knocked back nearly every single girl that's approached me over the past 12 months. The only few that have interested me already had partners. Frustrating, no?
And, on an amusing note, having not been drunk since last july, I forgot what it's like to wake up in the morning not knowing how you got home, with that horrible feeling of 'Oh fuck, what did I do?' staring at me from across the yawning chasm of my memory. I always _hated_ that part of drinking.
So, after a year of abstinance, temptation beckoned and I put up about as much resistance as a wet piece of toilet roll in a hurricane. Though the evening cost me no actual money, I must say the damage to my sense of self (not to mention my swollen hand) is the final nail in Jamie's drinking problem. That's it. Off for good. Managed to stay on the wagon for a year but I think that part of last night was an experiment to see if I've changed (under the influence, at least) to which the answer is a definite 'NO!'. So, no more beer for me which I believe is a good thing. Stuff tastes like crap most of the time anyway.
But I will miss a good pint of Guinness...
Ooh, probably off to Jilly's tomorrow (for a nice change). Anyone planning on attending?
...and that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I gave up drinking.
*sigh*
Well, the works' Summer Party was last night. Once again, I proved that I'm one of lifes' born teetotallers. Not because I don't enjoy drinking but largely due to the way I behave once inebriated. I have a tendency to become aggressive, start fights and generally upset the people I'm with. As of mid last year, I swore off alcohol and can honestly say I don't regret it. I used to drink rather a lot and would regularly finish an evening with my head down a loo somewhere, watching my last meal go past my eyes a second time. Unfortunately, my behaviour (and an aggravating tendency to wake up next to people I really shouldn't) caused me _many_ problems. Asha and a few other members who knew me back then will know what I mean.
Anyway, last night was a free bar. Normally, I wouldn't drink alcohol and would just stick to coke, red bull etc however being completely broke I couldn't afford my usual substances (substituted for drinking a while back) so fell back on getting pissed.
And get pissed I did.
Massively.
I currently am sporting a few trophies from the evening- namely a _MOTHERFUCKER_ of a hangover and what may be a broken knuckle (I'll know when the swelling goes down) on my right hand. My hand is rather a mess (meaning this is taking bloody ages to type) but the good news is that I _think_ (I'm not sure- my memory when drinking is patchy at best) I hit something, rather than someone. I haven't had any irate phonecalls telling me what I cunt I was (yet, anyway). Not quite sure why I was quite so fucked off last night (an observation made by a few friends- they said I was cheesed off but no-one knew why) but I can hazard a guess-
In keeping with my tendency to go for girls with boyfriends, I've become scarily enamored with one of the girls from work. Have in fact liked her for the better part of six months, which for me is frankly astonishing, as I have the attention span of a goldfish. Anyways, said young lady was there last night, looking great, as always (sickening, isn't it?). What put my back up, was upon going back to my hotel room, having been a good boy all night and not put the moves on her, wandering in to find one of my mates having sex with her, then having to listen to it happening in the next room for the better part of an hour.
This made me grumpy.
Some choice words were had with so-called friend this morning, which didn't come to blows (but was a close-run thing). But hey, life's full of disappointments. *wry smile*
Though I must confess to having become bored of being single. It's been a very long time since I last went out with anyone (rather than one-night standing it) and I'm pretty sure I'm back to a point where the thought of being in a relationship doesn't scare the shit outta me. Last couple of girlfriends fell through largely due to my apparent inability to deal with monogamy. Though, again those events stemmed from my drinking problems so hopefully shouldn't be an issue anymore. So, the hunt's on- I just have to find someone who measures up to my unrealistically high standards. To clarify, a lot of my friends tell me I'm too goddamn picky when it comes to women. I would normally disagree but can see their point when, looking back, I've knocked back nearly every single girl that's approached me over the past 12 months. The only few that have interested me already had partners. Frustrating, no?
And, on an amusing note, having not been drunk since last july, I forgot what it's like to wake up in the morning not knowing how you got home, with that horrible feeling of 'Oh fuck, what did I do?' staring at me from across the yawning chasm of my memory. I always _hated_ that part of drinking.
So, after a year of abstinance, temptation beckoned and I put up about as much resistance as a wet piece of toilet roll in a hurricane. Though the evening cost me no actual money, I must say the damage to my sense of self (not to mention my swollen hand) is the final nail in Jamie's drinking problem. That's it. Off for good. Managed to stay on the wagon for a year but I think that part of last night was an experiment to see if I've changed (under the influence, at least) to which the answer is a definite 'NO!'. So, no more beer for me which I believe is a good thing. Stuff tastes like crap most of the time anyway.
But I will miss a good pint of Guinness...
Ooh, probably off to Jilly's tomorrow (for a nice change). Anyone planning on attending?
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
daisie:
Aww silly, you dont have to get me anything, you being there is more than good enough 
matt_organic:
Know it? Why dear boy, I rely on it.