Monday Oct 13, 2003

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A girl died in my house a long time ago. I found some of her clothes and put them on. And then I was not me. I retained enough of myself only to recognize that I wasnt me, and I couldnt stop it.

Then he came up behind me and started to kiss me. Me, or her? Who was he? He grabbed me and I asked him who are you?

He said its me.

I didnt believe him. I didnt want him touching me. I screamed at him. Who are you?!

He said again its me.

I writhed to get free, but he held me so I couldnt.

Then I woke up.

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agh nightmares... i have them all the time and they always seem so real.

after the last dream i posted, a few people asked me if i was lucid... the answer is yes, sometimes. but i'd almost rather not. because i can realize i'm dreaming, and then i can't get out. and most of the time i can't control it, and i just have to be aware... i am watching someone do horrible things, or i do them myself...

sometimes my dreams are wonderful, awesome. there is so much detail. it can be like this beautiful fantasy world. but also like hell.

some of them are posted here.

so wish me sweet dreams...

i also wanna say thank you to all the people that tried to cheer me up... i've made a lot of really good friends here, and i appreciate every one. kiss
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moniker42:
I've been having the weirdist dreams lately. I think weird dreams visit people the world over at the same time, or maybe I'm just romantic enough to believe that because we are pisces, we recieve weird dreams on some grand psychic level all around a similar fulcrum.

I, myself, was batman last night in a dream. Of course, I had a gun, which is awfully unbatman of me. Hunter S Thompson visits my dreams frequently as well.

I recall there being a great deal more depth than just being batman.

Something about several differing colonies of humans, some that are all genetically modified, some cyborgs of some kind.

I think it was somewhere to the tune of battlestar galactica.

I'm so sensitive to the various forms of media I'm absolutly bombarded with. It's like that book 'Four arguements for the elimination of television'. Good book.

I'm often left wondering which part of the dream was genuinely my own, and which parts were from TV, or from some book I read, or whatever.

It's all part of being a pisces.
h3athrow:
H'lo. Thanks for the elbow. I've, how you say... Been busy. My blog is where i keep most up to date, but i do still need sg. And you are part of the reason why.

So thanks for leaving a message -- and for reminding me to check in more often. I gre up south of madison, i'm a pisces, and my job's still hella rad.

Tonight i've read an issue of too much hopeless savages, im'd a friend about a book project on css, and debated going to a show. My apartment's a wreck with some heating work, and i'm still high on some family and vacation time.

Take care of yourself!

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