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fall

East Bay

Member Since 2004

Followers 56 Following 41

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Wednesday Sep 14, 2005

Sep 13, 2005
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I need someone to talk to... I feel like i have no one.
My best friend, of 11 years, has died from cancer.
He knew me, before i even knew myself. He was one of those people that you are so similar with and you think, hey we would make a great couple... and you try, doesnt work... but then again for some reason you would always try again (just to make sure, i guess)... No one i ever dated was good enough for me in his eyes.
I remember the last time i saw him, i was so mad at him... cant even remember why,,, i always always scared to call him, just the fear of knowing he might not be there,,, well finally the fear came true.
I feel like a huge part of me has died, i dont think i will ever find anyone who will be close to him...
We have a secret spot... i will entrust the information with you... It was on the roof of an elementry school...we would grab some beers, crawl up top... and spend hours under the stars... it always made me feel better. The creepest sound of emtpy swings swinging... chills. I want to cry so hard until i cant breath, but i cant get the tear out. sometimes i dont even want to stand up...
My dream was to marry my high school sweetheart... i just love the fact of history... true history with a person. the high school sweetheart didnt work out... but i thought... hey... i will always have my best friend there... He was 22 years old.
im out of things to say.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
slamcage:
As long as you live he still lives. I still talk to so many people that have moved on. You know where to find me.
Sep 20, 2005
bettyann:
I am so sorry for your loss. I don't presume to know what you are going through right now, and cannot imagine your pain, but I thinking of you and hope that soon you will find peace.
Sep 23, 2005

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