faefae

Oh man.


I'm having an identify crisis.

I want to identify with my roots, but I'm Cherokee and Irish, two entirely different roots, two cultures, and I don't know which one I identify with more.

I know I look pretty pale in my pictures, but I'm actually rather tan, it's all the lighting.

My skin isn't dark enough to be recognized as Cherokee, and it isn't light enough to be recognized as Irish. I have Irish eyes, but a Cherokee mouth and face. I have Irish freckles, but a Cherokee nose.

I have a Cherokee figure, and Cherokee hair (when it happens to be the natural color), and I have Irish hands.

People believe me when I say I'm Irish, because the signs are so obvious, but, not many people know much about the Cherokee people, so those signs aren't so obvious, and I can't even be recognized by my band because my grandfather didn't have a birth certificate, and he was full blooded Cherokee.

I want to be proud of my heritage, but how can I be when there are two heritages to be proud of, I can't push one above the other, I may be more Cherokee than anything else, but even with that, I can't be fully recognized as what I am.

This sucks.