ezra

hey everybody. its been a long as freakin time since ive been on here. well just to give you an update on things. im 21 now i became that way on june 3rd. im working at 24 hr fitness as the overnight guy so i dont really sleep at night any more its kinda weird but its alright. im still in castro valley with my friend heather and her bf. they are doing good. i guess im being more "responsible" i have calmed down alot on drugs and alcohol. im pretty much just a chain smoking pot head that is broke until payday lol. i am gettin my life in order i think. im doin it slow but im doin it. i still need to get my i.d. and my drivers license. its pretty lame that i dont have one lol. i still wanna be a nurse so im going to go to school as soon as i get my i.d. lol. but i am also trying to become a comedian. i think im doin alright. i have alot of jokes written down and i have performed for my friends and they really liked it and laughed alot. so im gonna write some more stuff and get my act together so i can go to an open mic night some where prolly in san francisco or somethin and hopefully i will get noticed lol. and my dream is to perform on the conan o'brian show. i would be able to die happy if that happens. seriously lol. well thats about it really.

this is one of my newer jokes please tell me what you think and be honest. i dont care how honest you are if it sucks let me know cuz i dont wanna tell a crappy joke in front of hella people and i get boo'ed off stage. i would cry. so let me know what you think.



joke

i was at this party and i was mingling, and by mingling i mean trying to find the easiest and drunkest girl there. so i run into this one girl and we start talking. about five minutes into the mingle she said that she just got an xbox. so i say thats awesome and ask her what kind of games she likes. she kinda laughed and said "not that kind of xbox." im thinkin what kind of xbox is she talkin about. about this time she pulls down her pants and her underwears and she had some electrical tape in the shape of an x on her vagina. i laugh. but not cuz she has an x there. im laughing cuz i just found the drunkest easy girl there. so we go to a room. she starts talking about it and it turns out to be a sign of her abstinence. so i say thats really interesting. and that i gotta pee hella bad. and i left and did what i should have done in the first place. i went and picked up a hooker.
its much better then having to stick with a normal girl. this way when you leave your house you dont have to look over your shoulder all the damn time. and not to mention a hooker can handle a one night stand better then any guy can. You run into her at the grocery store, your like hey remember me? she kinda laughs "who?" and walks away still laughing.
youd think she would remember the guy who "according to her" gave her the best she ever had.



thats one of the jokes that i have. so let me know how it is.



*edit*
july 27 go to the punchline in san francisco because nick swordsan is doing stand up there and he is hella funny. and not to mention i will be there so i will deffinitly be worth the trip. and tell me "hi"