Another day. I am beginning to hate days. They just signify that I am still not over my ex. This sucks. Time needs to speed up and get this over with. The bad spells are starting to get farther and farther apart, but not far enough. I tried to help it along with someone else but that isnt working and its not fair to the other person. So that has to end. I am tainted goods, bad meat even. I am still completely fucked over her and can't believe that it is over. I cant believe she threw us and me away like that. I guess that is what just floors me the most. I guess I never will know why.
This is a bad spell if you can't tell. At least I am holding strong and not breaking down and calling her or emailing her to beg. Thank god for that. I think that in my fall from her grace, I have hit a ledge. I will sink no further. I think i'll just hang out here for a while like Ed Harris in the Abyss. Maybe some winged angel will happen upon me and carry me back to the surface.
Maybe not.
Time will tell.
Time sucks ass.
I miss Tigerlili.
This is a bad spell if you can't tell. At least I am holding strong and not breaking down and calling her or emailing her to beg. Thank god for that. I think that in my fall from her grace, I have hit a ledge. I will sink no further. I think i'll just hang out here for a while like Ed Harris in the Abyss. Maybe some winged angel will happen upon me and carry me back to the surface.
Maybe not.
Time will tell.
Time sucks ass.
I miss Tigerlili.
I think once you get to Knoxville things are going to get better and some gorgeous angel will swoop down from the sky and get you and help you to get right.
New starts are good. After all, you're 79 years young! You've got your whole freakin life ahead of you.
Buck up, cowboy.
xoxoxo
i'm sorry you've hit a rough patch. i totally get how you feel. i've had that feeling too, lately, of stuff just being drrraaawwwnnnn out...enough already! and from your journal it sounds like the girly you were excited about isn't working out, and i'm sorry for that too. BUT, No Beating Yourself Up. maybe there's stuff you want to work on, patterns worth investigating, but tigerlily sez be nice to you. ex's reasons are just that...HERS. doesn't mean it's truth.
yer still my favorite stuntman!