ha i am one crazy person for doing what i'm going to do. so this week i have 40 hours at work. fine with me, i really need money for school/bills and so on. but next week school is starting up. i'm taking 13 units on tuesdays and thursdays. my schedule has me working 40 hours again. so my "days off" are the days i'll be at school from 9-5.sigh. this semester is going to be hard. but at the same time i'm really looking forward to it. i cant wait to get back into school because in the past it was the center of so many problems for me. i never did well because of(now i know) my problems with being bipolar. this will be the first time i have tried to go back to school since i was diagnosed and am on medication. i have so much hope for this semester. i am so determined to do this. i know i actually have the tools now. the playing field has been evened out and i have as much a chance as anyone. this really makes me anxious and nervous.but in a kinda good way. so we will see what happens there.
i'm just stressed out. the text books alone are going to cost me close to $300. apparently my 17 year old cousin is going to jail. he tried to get attention in all the wrong ways 2 years ago when his parents divorced. his parents didnt give him enough attention.he ended up trying to get into gang activity and recently had his 3rd run in with the law.so we will see. he's going to go in for 9months-1year.
secondly my home life is a bit stressful. in a nut shell. my father has always been abusive. physically to my mother. a little bit of that to my sister and myself, but everyone got bad emotional abuse. my mother is finally getting in the process of leaving him. we are secretly getting things in order with money and everything. i just told my younger sister everything that was going on last night and it was a really emotional talk.
the sleep issues are a side effect of all this. when i get stressed i dont sleep. so i had to call out of work on wednesday because i wasnt coherent. i dont even remember what happened. my mom said i wasnt making sense and was dizzy. so she called in for me.
sigh.
just felt like getting that out on paper(blog). we'll see how all this goes.
i'm just stressed out. the text books alone are going to cost me close to $300. apparently my 17 year old cousin is going to jail. he tried to get attention in all the wrong ways 2 years ago when his parents divorced. his parents didnt give him enough attention.he ended up trying to get into gang activity and recently had his 3rd run in with the law.so we will see. he's going to go in for 9months-1year.
secondly my home life is a bit stressful. in a nut shell. my father has always been abusive. physically to my mother. a little bit of that to my sister and myself, but everyone got bad emotional abuse. my mother is finally getting in the process of leaving him. we are secretly getting things in order with money and everything. i just told my younger sister everything that was going on last night and it was a really emotional talk.
the sleep issues are a side effect of all this. when i get stressed i dont sleep. so i had to call out of work on wednesday because i wasnt coherent. i dont even remember what happened. my mom said i wasnt making sense and was dizzy. so she called in for me.
sigh.
just felt like getting that out on paper(blog). we'll see how all this goes.
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And my mum and dad were in the same situation but they separated when I was 10. At the time it was the worst news ever, but in hindsight it was the best thing they could've done. My dad's still way abusive to my little brother and sister who still live with him, but they don't want to live with my mum so there's not really anything we feel like we can do (also we live 6 hours away from the town they live in still)
Family stuff is difficult.. and don't overwork yourself! Take care and good luck