evy

These conversations get a little easier and feel less strained every time. Hell, this time, we just had fun and joked around.

To clarify, Alex is my ex-fiance.



Drugged Dancing!

Alex: well thanks
Me: for?
Alex: leading me on
Me: huh?
Me: oh
Alex: to thinking you were online
Me: I was like.. "What the hell? How many drugs are you on?!?!"
Alex: lol
Alex: I am not LOOPY!
Alex: I feel fine
Me: You mean you aren't going to give me a little show?
Alex: not that doped up
Me: damn
Me: I was hoping you would dance around or something
Alex: nope
Me: Now I'm depressed
Me: My entire evening was hanging on to you doing a little drugged dance for me.
Me: Especially since I'm going to get yelled at for blowing Joe off and not going to the club.
Alex: haha


Fuck that! But not him!!

Me: But he wants me to go in that really tall building with the glass floors so he can watch me have a seizure and die.
Alex: that is nice
Me: *rolls eyes*
Me: He doesn't believe me that I'm afraid of heights.
Me: And when I die and he's sad and has to explain how he killed me to my mom, he'll regret it. \
Alex: so you are going to CAnada so he can kill you?
Alex: then he will dispose of you
Me: Nah, I think he cares about me too much to kill me and throw me in the lake.
Me: And I think he would fear for the wrath of my mother
Alex: lol
Me: Besides, I would totally haunt his ass
Alex: you Ass Haunter!
Me: lol
Me: Everytime he'd want to sit down, I'd be there!
Alex: in his ass
Alex: haunting him
Me: Whenever he feels the need to make a poo... I'd be ........ ew... there
Me: Whenever he felt the need to receive a rim job, I'd be there.
Me: Oh man... maybe I won't haunt his ass
Alex: lol not that good of an idea anymore is it?
Me: Not really.
Me: And I sure as shit - no pun intended - don't want to be there when he is getting sexed up by someone else.... *shudders*
Me: I'll selectively haunt him in the normal ways, I suppose.
Alex: before he got to the sexin up
Me: Exactly
Me: I'd tell his... person... how he killed me and they'd be like, "Fuck that! But not him!!"


Ghost Sex!

Alex: fuck your ghost?
Me: sure!
Me: That'd be hott!
Me: Hott ghost sex!
Alex: lol how would that work?
Me: I'm not sure.. I'll let you know when I figure that one out.
Alex: would you have to do pottery like in Ghost?
Me: Yes... exactly
Me: And he'd be like... "La la la pottery.. Oh... OH... OOOOOOOOOH... ghost sex! While making pottery!"
Alex: oh yes!
Alex: lots of pottery
Me: ALL NIGHT!
Me: And his friends would wonder what had gotten into him because he'd have pots EVERYWHERE!!Alex: you would need lots of clay
Me: This is true
Me: I hear it's one of Canada's natural resources though.
Me: It grows on trees.
Alex: clay?
Alex: or ghost sex?
Me: clay
Me: which leads to ghost sex
Alex: clay does not grow on trees
Me: It does in Canada
Me: So does marijuana and legalized gay marriage.
Me: *nods*
Alex: it does not grow on trees!!!
Me: Oh... and prescription drugs. That's why they are so cheap.