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evon

Member Since 2005

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Tuesday Dec 13, 2005

Dec 13, 2005
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*sighs* and the plot thickens.....

I will explain in a few. I just woke up at dons house, its 1:30 and my skin burns. Its hot as hell in here and i cant take it. I got a message on mojo from Jeff a few minutes ago. That was interesting. Right when i thought i had completely gotten over things with him, he pops up. He said that he misses me and that he's wanted to call me a lot of times but hadnt gotten the balls to do it. I wrote him back saying that he could call me whenever he wanted, yada yada yada. okay so thats the end of that story.

As for the other one...things with Johnny. You know that message that i said i left him like 2 days ago?? I still havent gotten a respomse from him. Its starting to worry me too. I hope i didnt freak him out, but ive gotten to the point where i want to know EXACTLY what is going on. He hasnt send me a message back nor called me nor emailed me, so i have no idea what the deal is. Im just going to assume that all of the things i assumed before and everything that i was hoping for and that everything that i thought could develop was nothing more that a show, and it wont really happen. Man, i hate being so negative but thats how i feel. I wanted for the two of us to be together. I know that i may be jumping to conclusions like i do a lot, but shit. Im not a whore. I dont go around having sex with random guys. I dont want that label. I want to be with someone who cares for me, blah blah blah, ive said this shit a thousand times. Im actually tired of saying it my damned self. I think i need to just focus on other shit and find something else to worry about than guys. As much as i would love to be in a serious relationship with someone, i really dont think that im meant to be in one. At ;east not right now. I feel like saying fuck it. Me, don, and jesus went to the Mag bar last night. Jesus brought some white trash chick that hes talking to. They kept making out and i started getting very verbal about how tacky, annoying and just plain Gross it was to watch them. I hate going places with couples and being the 3rd wheel. Its anoying. And im rambling on about my bitterness with modern dating and relationships...wowzers. I guess i should just forget about that message i sent Johnny and wait for him to call me randomly either in the week or at the end of the week. If he does. That is if i didnt freak him out too much by that message. frown IT sucks because i really do like him and it seems like whenever my feelings for someone start to grow, it emds before it can even get off the ground.*sighs* I need to get back to sleep and then get ready for work. Someone tell me something funny to cheer me up?? please?? frown frown
pyrate:
i dread trying to get over.
Dec 14, 2005

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