here are the answers to your fabulous questions. and might I just say, that some of you are total freaks. 
1) you have a goat named Timmy?yes. I believe you call him "mom".
2) whats the meaning of life? it has none. get the rope.
3) where do babies come from? how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?
4) why is the sky blue? because I liked blue better than magenta.
5) What does this make you think of?
a nightmare I will have every day for the rest of my life.
6) How many worn undergarments were sent in my box? including my neighbor's? 31.
7) What is your favorite Goo Goo Dolls song? iris.
8) Do you wear jeans? like they were a motherfucking uniform.
9) Do you have a dvd player? what is this deee veee deeee thing that you speak of?
10) What do you think of Yves Tanguy's art? I dig. his work reminds me of dali, who is one of my favorites. I once spent an entire day from opening to closing in the dali museum. aren't you glad I told you that?
11) How much coffee do you drink during the day? not nearly enough. pretty much all day long.
12) What do YOU think I should buy with about $700? something that will make you happy that you wouldn't ordinarily buy for yourself. like 675 krispykreme donuts.
13) Do you think Toshiro Mifune was hot?
how could anyone think he wasn't?
14) I own 5 machetes of various length. Turned on? so. very. much.
15) Ever read the book "The Mouse and His Child"? no. I don't want to cry.
16) I just broke something Irish for you. Confused? you're not talking about your pee-pee, are you?
17) Wanna be my 10 year HS reunion date? it depends. can I be verbally abusive to people? maybe start a fist fight?
18) Can you post a pic of my family crest here without giving away my last name? sure.
19) Want more questions than this? bring it.
20) I am very attracted to your left eye. The right one is okay but the left one...my god! Can I have it? to put it plainly, no.
21) How many bleachings does it take before your hair turns to jelly and melts off your head? I'm not sure...I'll let you know in a couple of days...
22) Why are you so mean? because I can be. real life sucks losers dry...if you want to fuck with the eagles, you have to learn how to fly.
23) why is everyone always asking questions? to piss you off.
24) why ask why? why...not?
25) fuck till ya die? the other person would die first.
26) cant you try? yoda would kick your ass for that.
27) what are you wearing? agent_de_surreal's underpants.
28) timmy has a goatass?? yes. it's quite large, in fact. don't say anything to him - he's very self-conscious.
29) have you ever danced with the devil by the pale moon light? it's hard to dance with yourself.
30) Timmy? Timmy and the Lords of the Underworld? yeah, sure, whatever.
31) Want some candy? is it "bad man" candy? if so, FUCKYOU! MOMMY!!! HELP ME!
32) Is there such a thing as emotional cheating? of course. maybe even worse than physically cheating.
33) Is it wrong that i hid behind my book to avoid talking to my little sister who had just gotten on the bus I was on? *shrug* do YOU think it was wrong? only you can choose the path to righteousness, my son.
34) Wasn't Mark Knopfler the one who did that song you quoted? yupa.
35) why? because I said so, motherfucker. now go to your room.
36) how is hell this time of year? i don't get to visit as often as i like. it is about the same as it is the rest of the year. bring sunblock.
37) I thought you were going to California for a boy. Whatever happened with that? who says I didn't? they have internet too, you know. I'm in agent_de_surreal's basement right now.
38) Where is that quote in bold from? the princess bride theme song.
39) Your place or mine? mine. see earlier comment about the sunblock.
40) What's in the closest drawer by your bed? flashlight, knives, rubber cement, one of your cigarettes, the cds that you made me, a few pens that don't work, and one that does. oh...and a hair elastic.
41) Igloo or teepee and why? teepee. I don't like the cold, ever.
42) More pictures please? trade.
43) Do you ever talk on the phone in your car for a long time? once in a while. the palmetto bugs scare me, though.
44) To who? I'll give you a hint. their name starts with "y" and ends with "ou".
45) Who wrote Winnie The Pooh? a.a. milne.
46) what burns your soul? can't burn what you don't have.
47) are you really evil? just the fact that you wonder enough to ask should be answer enough.
48) how many times a day do you think about me? not as much as I think about myself.
49) are you touching yourself when you do? you mean, like the song? thanks...now that will be stuck in my head for hours. fucker.
50) do you paint your toenails? Could I? sometimes. not usually. no...you can't. you can paint your own, though. that's hawt.
51) do you own a corset? do you wear it? no.
52) do you like be spanked? yup. the more violent, the better. just ask agent_de_surreal.
53) what's the strangest thing you've ever done? define strange. maybe my strange and your strange aren't the same kind of strange. I'll tell you what I *haven't* done.....let a cat lick my pussy while masterbating. 
54) was it to get sex? I don't have to "get" sex....it just rolls in, like the tide.
55) when was the last time you had sex with something with a heartbeat? good thing you clarified that...other wise I might have gone on about my necrophilia. freak. no soup for you!
56) what happened to that snake in your fence? that motherfucker is still out there. I'm not touching it. I did do a counterspell just in case there was some evil afoot.
57) were the answers to the above two questions the same?? you are fired. please clean out your desk before 5pm EST.
58) how tall are you? 5'2"
59) what's really at the end of my rainbow? that pot of gold thing is one of the greatest lies of all time. the rainbow really is a giant slide through the back door of hell. I know it sounds cruel...but really...greedy motherfuckers. they deserve hell.
60) do you ever say please? no. I don't say "mother may I", either.
61) do you ever sway under the burden of rocking so hard? of course not. then I wouldn't really rock, eh? what a dumb fucking question.
62) is this cheese still good? does it smell like your mom? if so, then it's bad, dude. burn it.
63) what color is your ipod mini? don't you use that kind of language with me, young man. firecrotch!!
64) coffee, iced or hot? blasphemous bitch. HOT! always HOT! iced coffee is for pussies.
65) sex, iced or hot? see answer to # 64. say it loud and proud.
66) more? sure. I like pain.
67) If I die tomorrow, would you remember me? or just piss on my grave? isn't that the same? I would piss on your grave in your memory. it would be the right thing to do. I'd wait until after the funeral guests had left, though...don't worry.
goddamn....I take back the lazy comment about people who answer questions. that was like taking the SAT's. *snort*
eat a dick and have a nice day.
xoxoxox
wil
"for my breast shaken with doves,
for my derelict dying, with a single mistaken bypasser."
1) you have a goat named Timmy?yes. I believe you call him "mom".
2) whats the meaning of life? it has none. get the rope.
3) where do babies come from? how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?
4) why is the sky blue? because I liked blue better than magenta.
5) What does this make you think of?
a nightmare I will have every day for the rest of my life.
6) How many worn undergarments were sent in my box? including my neighbor's? 31.
7) What is your favorite Goo Goo Dolls song? iris.
8) Do you wear jeans? like they were a motherfucking uniform.
9) Do you have a dvd player? what is this deee veee deeee thing that you speak of?
10) What do you think of Yves Tanguy's art? I dig. his work reminds me of dali, who is one of my favorites. I once spent an entire day from opening to closing in the dali museum. aren't you glad I told you that?
11) How much coffee do you drink during the day? not nearly enough. pretty much all day long.
12) What do YOU think I should buy with about $700? something that will make you happy that you wouldn't ordinarily buy for yourself. like 675 krispykreme donuts.
13) Do you think Toshiro Mifune was hot?
how could anyone think he wasn't?
14) I own 5 machetes of various length. Turned on? so. very. much.
15) Ever read the book "The Mouse and His Child"? no. I don't want to cry.
16) I just broke something Irish for you. Confused? you're not talking about your pee-pee, are you?
17) Wanna be my 10 year HS reunion date? it depends. can I be verbally abusive to people? maybe start a fist fight?
18) Can you post a pic of my family crest here without giving away my last name? sure.
19) Want more questions than this? bring it.
20) I am very attracted to your left eye. The right one is okay but the left one...my god! Can I have it? to put it plainly, no.
21) How many bleachings does it take before your hair turns to jelly and melts off your head? I'm not sure...I'll let you know in a couple of days...
22) Why are you so mean? because I can be. real life sucks losers dry...if you want to fuck with the eagles, you have to learn how to fly.
23) why is everyone always asking questions? to piss you off.
24) why ask why? why...not?
25) fuck till ya die? the other person would die first.
26) cant you try? yoda would kick your ass for that.
27) what are you wearing? agent_de_surreal's underpants.
28) timmy has a goatass?? yes. it's quite large, in fact. don't say anything to him - he's very self-conscious.
29) have you ever danced with the devil by the pale moon light? it's hard to dance with yourself.
30) Timmy? Timmy and the Lords of the Underworld? yeah, sure, whatever.
31) Want some candy? is it "bad man" candy? if so, FUCKYOU! MOMMY!!! HELP ME!
32) Is there such a thing as emotional cheating? of course. maybe even worse than physically cheating.
33) Is it wrong that i hid behind my book to avoid talking to my little sister who had just gotten on the bus I was on? *shrug* do YOU think it was wrong? only you can choose the path to righteousness, my son.
34) Wasn't Mark Knopfler the one who did that song you quoted? yupa.
35) why? because I said so, motherfucker. now go to your room.
36) how is hell this time of year? i don't get to visit as often as i like. it is about the same as it is the rest of the year. bring sunblock.
37) I thought you were going to California for a boy. Whatever happened with that? who says I didn't? they have internet too, you know. I'm in agent_de_surreal's basement right now.
38) Where is that quote in bold from? the princess bride theme song.
39) Your place or mine? mine. see earlier comment about the sunblock.
40) What's in the closest drawer by your bed? flashlight, knives, rubber cement, one of your cigarettes, the cds that you made me, a few pens that don't work, and one that does. oh...and a hair elastic.
41) Igloo or teepee and why? teepee. I don't like the cold, ever.
42) More pictures please? trade.
43) Do you ever talk on the phone in your car for a long time? once in a while. the palmetto bugs scare me, though.
44) To who? I'll give you a hint. their name starts with "y" and ends with "ou".
45) Who wrote Winnie The Pooh? a.a. milne.
46) what burns your soul? can't burn what you don't have.
47) are you really evil? just the fact that you wonder enough to ask should be answer enough.
48) how many times a day do you think about me? not as much as I think about myself.
49) are you touching yourself when you do? you mean, like the song? thanks...now that will be stuck in my head for hours. fucker.
50) do you paint your toenails? Could I? sometimes. not usually. no...you can't. you can paint your own, though. that's hawt.
51) do you own a corset? do you wear it? no.
52) do you like be spanked? yup. the more violent, the better. just ask agent_de_surreal.
53) what's the strangest thing you've ever done? define strange. maybe my strange and your strange aren't the same kind of strange. I'll tell you what I *haven't* done.....let a cat lick my pussy while masterbating.
54) was it to get sex? I don't have to "get" sex....it just rolls in, like the tide.
55) when was the last time you had sex with something with a heartbeat? good thing you clarified that...other wise I might have gone on about my necrophilia. freak. no soup for you!
56) what happened to that snake in your fence? that motherfucker is still out there. I'm not touching it. I did do a counterspell just in case there was some evil afoot.
57) were the answers to the above two questions the same?? you are fired. please clean out your desk before 5pm EST.
58) how tall are you? 5'2"
59) what's really at the end of my rainbow? that pot of gold thing is one of the greatest lies of all time. the rainbow really is a giant slide through the back door of hell. I know it sounds cruel...but really...greedy motherfuckers. they deserve hell.
60) do you ever say please? no. I don't say "mother may I", either.
61) do you ever sway under the burden of rocking so hard? of course not. then I wouldn't really rock, eh? what a dumb fucking question.
62) is this cheese still good? does it smell like your mom? if so, then it's bad, dude. burn it.
63) what color is your ipod mini? don't you use that kind of language with me, young man. firecrotch!!
64) coffee, iced or hot? blasphemous bitch. HOT! always HOT! iced coffee is for pussies.
65) sex, iced or hot? see answer to # 64. say it loud and proud.
66) more? sure. I like pain.
67) If I die tomorrow, would you remember me? or just piss on my grave? isn't that the same? I would piss on your grave in your memory. it would be the right thing to do. I'd wait until after the funeral guests had left, though...don't worry.
goddamn....I take back the lazy comment about people who answer questions. that was like taking the SAT's. *snort*
eat a dick and have a nice day.
xoxoxox
wil
"for my breast shaken with doves,
for my derelict dying, with a single mistaken bypasser."
VIEW 25 of 73 COMMENTS
"Willow. you are great" *w/ British accent*