eurevry

Every other day I wonder, I think...Dad are you proud of me? Father our time was short, my thoughts now, my mind now, you'll never get to know. You just knew the little boy who loved you, who clung to your every word. The little boy who looked up and saw a man, a great man. All that made you great was that you loved me and I knew that, I could feel it. That was all I needed...Were you proud of me then, was there anything to be proud of? So now, here now...I've accomplished nothing, I've done nothing. I guess I'm still that silly little boy, but now I need something more. You're not here so I can ask, yet I hear no answer...just silence. You're not up there looking down on me, i'm not that delusional. You ceased to exist...thats all there is to it. You lived and then you didn't. Your mind gone, your memories gone, your opinions gone, your stories gone. I hardly remember you anymore, but I barely got to know you. I missed memorial day, I didn't miss it or forget you. I had every intention of going to visit you and leave flowers in your memory. I simply chose not to, but I know you'd forgive me. I don't have to leave you flowers to remember who you are or what you did. I keep memory of you every day Father, I miss you, I don't need flowers to remind me. I wish we had our moment together father, as man to man. Tell you my dreams, what I hope to become. I wish I truly had the courage to be the person you probably always hoped I'd be.