eruvande

I have a complicated relationship with journals. I think it all sort of stems in my obsession with perfection. Or I guess that is what you would call it. I would consider myself a very confidant person, I feel that I am for the most part and I think in general that is how people perceive me(in the sense that I am not really outgoing but still just give off an air of confidence). When I was young and stupid, or well younger and more stupid I would easily get hurt by small comments. Nowadays this really doesnt bother me. But for some reason certain things just really get my hard and I cant even explain why because another day it wouldnt bother me, hormones? Who knows really? Anyways getting of track, showing of stuff that I write is a weird issue with me. I know my spelling; as well my grammar and well structure have a lot to aspire to. And that doesnt really bother me and I like the criticism but most of the time I cant stand people reading stuff that I have written. I still write and I do want people to read it, but there is just this bizarre little block. I also start one place and end up in another when thinking about personal things, even this little rant started with I think it all sort of stems in my obsession with perfection and now we are here.

Well ok, the point of this was to make myself a goal; by the time I have my surgery and send in my first set, my website should be up so that I make more sense to those remotely interested. Also to keep this journal somewhat up to date with meaningless blab.