how strange is the internet
that i can see a list that tells me with whom i am friends and that i can not recognize all of the names on that list
banal curiosities
have you ever found it necessary to just stop ~thinking~ about life? it's hard to write about what i mean because i just can't think about being alive. all that's left is to get on with it. when i think too much, i start painting myself into corners: how can i get along with others when they seem so insane? doesn't that mean everyone is intolerable? and then i forget about the ultimate integration of all-that-is, the one guiding principle of being alive. then i get freaked right out.
so i just can't think about it. life needs to be dealt with in small portions, occasionally standing back to get a look at the overall pattern, but more often just micro-movements towards simple goals.
yes, i admit, i am performing self-analysis in more-or-less public. shameless, utterly shameless. no more so than getting nekkid? but it's me that's paying for it.