Thank god there are still heros. Jon Stewart on Crossfire Ok, maybe I'm a big dork for thinking Jon Stewart is the shit, but look at the guy. He knows his shit, he is funny as hell, he is making it work!
Big thanks to Duffy for the videos. I looked all over for that video and finally found a link to it at k10k.
Anyway, lazy weekend, prettying up the blog, wondering how my S.O. is doing in S.F. I hope one day I can make it there. Still wondering if I will. Being so far from a city here in southern Oregon I kind of lose touch with the future. When I lived in Seattle and Portland things seemed more immediate. Things were happening. Now I've been at the same job for nearly 3 years (longest before that was barely a year), making good money (the surest way of becoming sedentary) and reasonably happy (for the first time, it feels). Seems funny that some days you almost wish it to fall apart so you can build it back up again. Like a child with building blocks. Destroy -> rebuild -> destroy. Maybe self-destructive behavior isn't all bad. We've been taught that it is what keeps us from happiness, but that isn't true. We are adaptive animals, we not only can adapt, we need to adapt to be healthy. Happiness isn't something that should be sought after 24/7. I wonder why we (I suppose we as americans, since I'm limited in my observation of other cultures) are so obsessed with happiness. I suppose the same reason that even those living below the poverty line are chronically obese. We have just about everything we need, we no longer struggle, we lose our will to create, solve problems, and challenge what we feel is wrong. So whenever I do anything or think anything that would disrupt any of those things, I feel guilty, like I'm on a self-defeating path and I'll ruin what I have. And, what do I have? Video games and web coding. Pre-press job and a little bit of design under-the-table. Few books, little TV, 1 friend, 1 lover, 1 stepchild.
Sigh... its like talking yourself into a car crash.
Big thanks to Duffy for the videos. I looked all over for that video and finally found a link to it at k10k.
Anyway, lazy weekend, prettying up the blog, wondering how my S.O. is doing in S.F. I hope one day I can make it there. Still wondering if I will. Being so far from a city here in southern Oregon I kind of lose touch with the future. When I lived in Seattle and Portland things seemed more immediate. Things were happening. Now I've been at the same job for nearly 3 years (longest before that was barely a year), making good money (the surest way of becoming sedentary) and reasonably happy (for the first time, it feels). Seems funny that some days you almost wish it to fall apart so you can build it back up again. Like a child with building blocks. Destroy -> rebuild -> destroy. Maybe self-destructive behavior isn't all bad. We've been taught that it is what keeps us from happiness, but that isn't true. We are adaptive animals, we not only can adapt, we need to adapt to be healthy. Happiness isn't something that should be sought after 24/7. I wonder why we (I suppose we as americans, since I'm limited in my observation of other cultures) are so obsessed with happiness. I suppose the same reason that even those living below the poverty line are chronically obese. We have just about everything we need, we no longer struggle, we lose our will to create, solve problems, and challenge what we feel is wrong. So whenever I do anything or think anything that would disrupt any of those things, I feel guilty, like I'm on a self-defeating path and I'll ruin what I have. And, what do I have? Video games and web coding. Pre-press job and a little bit of design under-the-table. Few books, little TV, 1 friend, 1 lover, 1 stepchild.
Sigh... its like talking yourself into a car crash.