emiloo

Over thinking, over anaylyzing seperates the body from the mind.
Withering my intuition, leaving opportunities behind.
Feed my will to feel this moment, urging me to cross the line.
Reaching out to EMBRACE THE RANDOM.
Reaching out to embrace whatever may come.
I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm,
to feel connected,
enough to step aside and weep like a widow,
to feel inspired,
to fathom the power,
to witness beauty,
to bathe in the fountain,
to swing on the spiral,
to swing on the spiral of divinity and still be a human.

With my feet upon the ground I move myself between the sounds and open wide to suck it in.
I feel it move across my skin.
I'm reaching up and reaching out.
I'm reaching for the random or whatever will bewilder me.
And following our will and wind we may just go where no one's been.
We'll ride the spiral to the end and may just go where no one's been.
Spiraloutkeepgoingspiraloutkeepgoing....

(I fucking love TOOL.)

I had a busy week last week. I saw The Cure, went dancing on Friday, then spent the weekend in Columbus with my brother who drives me fucking NUTS!!!
That would be an eventful week in the life of Emiloo.

SERIOUSLY....seriously....I fucking love Tool. I never ever ever get tired of them. Maynard's voice kills me.

U know who else I love? Natron. He is beautiful, and for the first time in my life, I'm with a guy who I feel I don't deserve. Usually it's the other way around, which sounds egotistical, but really..I've wasted a lot of time on guys who didn't deserve that time. It's a weird feeling....on one hand, I don't feel "good enough" for him, but on the other, I'm happy that I have him and I know that he doesn't want anything else. Oddness, slight confusion, and once again an over-analyzation. I just need to relax and bask. MmMmMmmmm...love.

Not sure if I'm going to be moving out as early as I planned, but it's ok. As much as I want to get out of this wretched hole, I'm quite comfortable. Although the art scene in Columbus, while not spectacular, is caaalllling me. There is nothing to inspire me in Findlay. Or maybe...I just need to look. Hmm.

So who wants to see me naked?? I'm really, really thinking about doing a set. It would be so much fun. Especially since I got it approved by my bro...I dunno, I would just feel uncomfortable if we moved in together having him think I'm a slut for being naked online. But he said, "As long as I don't see it, I don't care." Yay. Greatness.

Oh, I finally bought the YYYeah's album yesterday. Fucking AWESOME. I'm gonna have to update my fave bands soon..

I hope everyone is just as dandy as I am. Although I had a sudden dip in self-confidence last night and cried myself into a little ball of insecurity in Nate's arms....but of course, he had to go and make me feel all good about myself again. Bastard.

Later on, friends.