emiloo

Hehehe, oh man, I cannot stay away long. I love u guys too much. Ur my addiction. Ur all so cute and funny and nice

I have had the shittiest week, yet I am in the best mood I've had in months. Well, maybe weeks....but yeah, a while.
Lets see...broke up w/ John on Monday, worked double shifts all week, got in a huge, HUGE fight w/ him Tuesday night over some more lies I found out about, found out on Wednesday that my dad is gonna lose the first good, steady job he'd had in a decade come August, got yelled at by my boss, and I've been sick as a fuckin dog and losing weight involuntarily. (That last part isn't so bad.)

But u know what? I'm feeling downright jolly. But I'm afraid for the reason of my jollyness, because something happened that makes me all giddy and happy but at the same time I wish wouldn't have happened. And if u haven't figured what that is yet, I'll just tell u: me and Nate, Mr. Sidelines dude, got all cuddly the other night and ended up kissing and stuff, which although felt very awesome, also makes my head all whirly cuz now I don't know WHAT the fuck is going on. I keep saying I don't want to just move right along into another relationship, but by god, this guy makes me so happy. He's so laid back and comfortable and he's got the same twisted sense of humor as I do, and he just makes me feel good about myself. But I think right now, I need to learn how to feel good about myself alone, without having someone to provide that happiness for me. Maybe I just need to say fuck it, and enjoy what's happening right now, and try not to get too serious about it?? I dunno. At the moment, I'm in too good of a mood to care. I spend way too much time analyzing shit. SHEESH such language! I always think that the amount of swear words one uses in their regular speach is a reflection of how well read they are, and right now, I sound like a fuckin idiot. Haha, notice how I'm not just a regular idiot, but a fuckin one.

I am quite the goofy girl today. U know what kind of people piss me off? Those who act like "connoisuers" of obscure bands and make u feel like u don't know jack about music just because the music u prefer to listen to happpens to also be enjoyed by more than 20 people. It's kinda sad that so many great bands get looked down upon just because they happened/happen to reach a huge audience. There's a big difference between well-deserved fanbase expansion and selling out. It's called credibility, ASSHOLES. Arrrgh.

Hope u enjoyed the randomness. U guys seriously make me fuckin day.

Edited: I am so damn horny. Grr!