So I saw the Burlesque show last night...good and bad things ensued.
We showed up at the last possible second and were among the last in line. Luckily a "friend" of mine was up closer in the line and he let us cut in front of him, or rather, behind him. Once inside, we got some beers (I was supposed to go through some security guy who was checking ID's and giving people stamps but for some reason I walked right by him and he didn't even notice me). I was already pretty tipsy because I downed the last of my Riesling before the show and had nothing to eat prior for about 5 hours. Some bands played, one of them was some Japanese band. I thought the lead singer's voice was kind of annoying...but she had a lot of energy and the crowd seemed pretty excited.
Halfway through the last band, Steve and his two friends Todd and Pete and I moved up closer to the stage since we knew the girls would come on soon. I couldn't see a damned thing, but luckily there was a chair on the floor so I just stood on that and had a very decent view.
The show itself was really amazing. I am overwhelmed by how talented and sexy all the girls were. I got really excited when I saw Chloe since I know this was her first tour....she did a fantastic job of making my panties moist.
It was also fun seeing Nixon in action, since I saw her on the DVD of the last tour and she did the whole cape and bondage getup, which made me excited. Reagan was also as sexy as always...she did the bit with her as the teacher and...ummm....two other girls as students that were getting punished. Hot.
I screamed so much through the show that my throat is a little sore today. Every time an article of clothing started coming off I got...maybe even TOO excited. I blame the alcohol! And the fact that everyone was too sexy for their own damned good!
After the show, things....sort of took a negative turn. During one of the dances, Steve said something about, "You should learn that song", which I took to mean as the dance. I'm still not sure what he actually meant by that, but suddenly my self-esteem plummeted and I felt like the unsexiest being ever. I realized, "Hey, wait..shit, I can't dance like that." I got kind of down because I sometimes think it would be hot if I surprised him with a striptease but then I remember that I'm a clutz and have virtually no rhythm whatsoever. So, that kind of got my spirits down a little.
The girls came out to sell merchandise and sign things, and I noticed Akemi wasn't there like I thought she would be. I mentioned this out loud, and Steve said he was disappointed, too. I'm not sure if I gave off the wrong vibes or something, but all the sudden he attacked me with, "god forbid I find another girl attractive!"...I wasn't even really thinking that until he said it, so, my mood went into a steeper decline.
And then everything kind of hit the fan when we went over to the merch table. He said he wanted to buy me a book. He approached the table and was immediately assaulted by Fractal when she saw his Squee shirt he was wearing. She signed it, pulled him over and put her arm around him to take a pic with him, and Chloe was there as well, giving her own approval. Meanwhile, I just sort of stood there in the background, and my shyness kicked in...and a certain extent of jealously. Yeah yeah, obviously it was just harmless fun or whatever, but I think I was more jealous of the fact that Chloe didn't even see me at first, moreso than my boyfriend getting manhandled by a bunch of hot girls. Although admittedly that did kind of make my blood boil slightly, I think I saw my eyes narrow into slits when I saw myself in the mirror that was behind them.
I know, it was retarded to get so jealous. I don't think I would have if he hadn't made the "you should learn that" comment. I felt totally confident with myself until that point. Even during the show, he had his hand on me and I could tell when he was getting excited because his hand would tense up or he'd start drumming the beat of the music on me...and I had no problem with that. I was enjoying the show as much as he was and I thought it was hot that we were sharing that experience together.
It's really annoying how quickly my self-confidence plummets at the worst possible times.
Eventually I said hi to Chloe, and her, Fanny and Fractal signed the book...I think this was "the straw that broke the camel's back" so to speak.
Fractal obviously thought the book was for him because she wrote the word "SQUEE" in big letters on one of the pages. All the other girls were quick to sign also, thinking it was for him. At that point I felt defeated. I told him to keep the book and felt the sudden urge to jump off a building.
Over-reacting? Hell yes. I actually feel ashamed writing about it, because now it seems so absurd. I have a sneaky suspicion that the medication I've been taking has been playing a role in some pretty violent mood swings I've been having lately...I'm taking some weird hormone for acne (yes, you might not be able to tell but I have really bad skin....surprised?) and for the last week I keep forgetting to take it, so I'll double the dosage the next day. You're supposed to take three, once at breakfast, again at lunch, and dinner, etc. I've just been taking them all at once because I know I will only remember to once in the day. Lately I've been skipping and taking 6 pills at a time. A couple days ago I missed two days and almost took 9, but instead I took 6, and then took 6 again the next day. I was feeling fucking manic for a few days....I'd feel really optimistic part of the time and then feel like the world hated me the next. During one of my more depressed phases I bought a book, "Shyness and Social Anxiety" on a whim. It's actually really helpful so far....at least in acknowledging that I indeed do have, shall we say, some form of mild social dysfunction.
So, there you have it. Steve and I are going to get breakfast now. I have a hankering for pancakes...blueberry, banana, chocolate chip....and waffles...and omlettes....and bagels, and english muffins, and corned beef hash, and hash browns....and toast...with JELLY.
We showed up at the last possible second and were among the last in line. Luckily a "friend" of mine was up closer in the line and he let us cut in front of him, or rather, behind him. Once inside, we got some beers (I was supposed to go through some security guy who was checking ID's and giving people stamps but for some reason I walked right by him and he didn't even notice me). I was already pretty tipsy because I downed the last of my Riesling before the show and had nothing to eat prior for about 5 hours. Some bands played, one of them was some Japanese band. I thought the lead singer's voice was kind of annoying...but she had a lot of energy and the crowd seemed pretty excited.
Halfway through the last band, Steve and his two friends Todd and Pete and I moved up closer to the stage since we knew the girls would come on soon. I couldn't see a damned thing, but luckily there was a chair on the floor so I just stood on that and had a very decent view.
The show itself was really amazing. I am overwhelmed by how talented and sexy all the girls were. I got really excited when I saw Chloe since I know this was her first tour....she did a fantastic job of making my panties moist.
It was also fun seeing Nixon in action, since I saw her on the DVD of the last tour and she did the whole cape and bondage getup, which made me excited. Reagan was also as sexy as always...she did the bit with her as the teacher and...ummm....two other girls as students that were getting punished. Hot.
I screamed so much through the show that my throat is a little sore today. Every time an article of clothing started coming off I got...maybe even TOO excited. I blame the alcohol! And the fact that everyone was too sexy for their own damned good!
After the show, things....sort of took a negative turn. During one of the dances, Steve said something about, "You should learn that song", which I took to mean as the dance. I'm still not sure what he actually meant by that, but suddenly my self-esteem plummeted and I felt like the unsexiest being ever. I realized, "Hey, wait..shit, I can't dance like that." I got kind of down because I sometimes think it would be hot if I surprised him with a striptease but then I remember that I'm a clutz and have virtually no rhythm whatsoever. So, that kind of got my spirits down a little.
The girls came out to sell merchandise and sign things, and I noticed Akemi wasn't there like I thought she would be. I mentioned this out loud, and Steve said he was disappointed, too. I'm not sure if I gave off the wrong vibes or something, but all the sudden he attacked me with, "god forbid I find another girl attractive!"...I wasn't even really thinking that until he said it, so, my mood went into a steeper decline.
And then everything kind of hit the fan when we went over to the merch table. He said he wanted to buy me a book. He approached the table and was immediately assaulted by Fractal when she saw his Squee shirt he was wearing. She signed it, pulled him over and put her arm around him to take a pic with him, and Chloe was there as well, giving her own approval. Meanwhile, I just sort of stood there in the background, and my shyness kicked in...and a certain extent of jealously. Yeah yeah, obviously it was just harmless fun or whatever, but I think I was more jealous of the fact that Chloe didn't even see me at first, moreso than my boyfriend getting manhandled by a bunch of hot girls. Although admittedly that did kind of make my blood boil slightly, I think I saw my eyes narrow into slits when I saw myself in the mirror that was behind them.
I know, it was retarded to get so jealous. I don't think I would have if he hadn't made the "you should learn that" comment. I felt totally confident with myself until that point. Even during the show, he had his hand on me and I could tell when he was getting excited because his hand would tense up or he'd start drumming the beat of the music on me...and I had no problem with that. I was enjoying the show as much as he was and I thought it was hot that we were sharing that experience together.
It's really annoying how quickly my self-confidence plummets at the worst possible times.
Eventually I said hi to Chloe, and her, Fanny and Fractal signed the book...I think this was "the straw that broke the camel's back" so to speak.
Fractal obviously thought the book was for him because she wrote the word "SQUEE" in big letters on one of the pages. All the other girls were quick to sign also, thinking it was for him. At that point I felt defeated. I told him to keep the book and felt the sudden urge to jump off a building.
Over-reacting? Hell yes. I actually feel ashamed writing about it, because now it seems so absurd. I have a sneaky suspicion that the medication I've been taking has been playing a role in some pretty violent mood swings I've been having lately...I'm taking some weird hormone for acne (yes, you might not be able to tell but I have really bad skin....surprised?) and for the last week I keep forgetting to take it, so I'll double the dosage the next day. You're supposed to take three, once at breakfast, again at lunch, and dinner, etc. I've just been taking them all at once because I know I will only remember to once in the day. Lately I've been skipping and taking 6 pills at a time. A couple days ago I missed two days and almost took 9, but instead I took 6, and then took 6 again the next day. I was feeling fucking manic for a few days....I'd feel really optimistic part of the time and then feel like the world hated me the next. During one of my more depressed phases I bought a book, "Shyness and Social Anxiety" on a whim. It's actually really helpful so far....at least in acknowledging that I indeed do have, shall we say, some form of mild social dysfunction.
So, there you have it. Steve and I are going to get breakfast now. I have a hankering for pancakes...blueberry, banana, chocolate chip....and waffles...and omlettes....and bagels, and english muffins, and corned beef hash, and hash browns....and toast...with JELLY.
VIEW 23 of 23 COMMENTS
and your entry makes me want crazy amounts of breakfast food. *runs off to cook blueberry pancakes, eggs, and toast*
and Akemi never left LA