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elysia

Member Since 2005

Followers 40 Following 133

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Tuesday Apr 17, 2007

Apr 16, 2007
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"I told you, I blew a fuse when I totaled that electrical tower. I was checking out some daisies"

- Flight of The Navigator



I see they've been fucking about with it again. It's all getting a bit fluffy isn't it? It's slowly becoming the online equivalent to a cute little fluffy kitten .... with a great pair of breasts of course ....


In the last few weeks my dog died, my laptop crashed and wiped my hard drive (not backed up of course, I'm far too "busy") and my mobile phone wanked out on me. There were a few days when I felt a little like Tom Hanks in Castaway, only with a baby instead of a ball with a face painted on it.

I'm now back up to technological speed and the dog is sat in a box in my living room (in cremated form I'm not one for taxidermy, plus I don't have the space for a stuffed German Shepherd) whilst I decide what to do with him next.


Top five reasons I'm feeling a shit load better

(1) I hate being all emo
It's just all a bit too "boo hoo hoo I have depression so I'm going to put on the tightest trousers I can find in the hope that they cut off the circulation resulting in drainpipe suicide as I don't have the time to actually be suicidal as I'm far too busy crying into my myspace page" for my liking.

(2) A plastic guitar is better than sex (as if I'd remember)
Guitar Hero II, need I say more? It almost makes me feel a little better about the sacrifice of one of my guitars *sob* during our last house move.

(3) The missus



She now sits, eats food, says dadadad (how fucking ironic is that?), and is generally a cheeky little madam. She's now six months and starting to try to crawl. Seriously exhausting.

(4) I'm almost finished at work
The stress of having my butt puppet of a boss on the phone constantly was making Elysia a little tense, and a lot evil. In another few weeks I'll be able to tell them where they can stick their job without any financial repercussions and all will be well. They really are a bunch of nosy intrusive fat fingered paperclip hiding cock donkey rug munching Blair loving cunt monkeys.

(5) I've resumed contact with people
A large proportion of so called "friends" didn't like the all new Elysia with baby accessory, and it's been a bit of a bitch. There are a select few who have relentlessly stuck by me, and I've finally gotten round to answering their emails and calls. I might even get round to answering the comments of the few on here who fit into that category ... but don't count on it ....


Things for the SGUK meet are looking a little dismal. I promise to make it to a meet before madams fifth birthday, I swear.


"Were those geeks, David? Yes, Max. Those were geeks."


VIEW 14 of 14 COMMENTS
sickboyedd:
My life is more like an inverse of Tom Hanks in "Big" at the moment; my wish got granted and I sat in front of a machine giggling like a 4 year-old, thanks to the masterly Warhammer games for PC. I was never into the Games Workshop malarky, mainly because I wanted to get laid in my teens, but I can now appreciate the appeal of ordering around giant robots to murder aliens. My worry is that the PC game is a gateway drug to the rest of the shebang, and before I know it I'll be wanking off to Buffy The Vampire Slayer erotic fan fiction with 6 twenty-sided dice up my arse....
May 5, 2007
sky:
your daughter appears to have fantastic fashion sense.
May 9, 2007

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