elplaguita

So like i said before i have to start getting rid off some of the people that surround me, i havent really done it and now its gonna cost me a lot for last night i got in deep trouble because i wanted to be with them. Last night i decided to stay at home because i had a lot to do, i was really busy because i was gonna leave for six months on the second of january, i had people that wanted to work with me just because i was a good worker, dedicated, and always on time; i had my priorities straight, i knew what i wanted, and i had it for the most part. I was happy because i was living my life being myself but the saying goes "tell me who you hang around with and ill tell you who you are" and it seems that i have completely become what i most despised, what i was against, what i hate, one of them... and on top of all i hate myself for sayin that i would never become or do the things that i am and do right now.

For this and much more i feel miserable right now, i feel like im drowning in a pool of lies that me and only me have created, i feel like i have separated from myself and it seems like the only way to go back to the way i was its to overhaul my whole life wich means no more drinkin, no more wasting time, no more going out just to show the people im with that im cool, no more kissing ass, and most of all i got to start showing responsibility again, i have to step up at work and make up for all of the shit that i have done wrong till now.
I am just writing this because i need to get it out of my system.