elleseven

i am trying really hard to leave my room.

i have my hair up, my makeup on and i am fully clothed to boot!

my laptop got wet in the roofie/window incident.
it makes it ridiculously difficult to type and damn near impossible to capitalize letters>
and it likes to make those arrows instead of periods from time to time> ok most of the time
but, it still works!

i am taking a bit of a 'mental health' break from work
yup, its really close to quitting time.
i give myself 6 mos. tops

back to the whole leaving my room thing...
i quit smoking for the goddamn new year
what a stupid idea.
it sucks really bad...
of course i know it will be better in the long run.
but fuck.

today i was supposed to get down and dirty on my room.
i put a few things in boxes...
so much left to do.
so uninspired.

i am really missing a lot of people right now
old friends
old boyfriends
really old friends
i rarely miss anyone
its weird

i need someone in my life who inspires me to be a better person
i have a friend whom i admire
she is trying out the marriage thing
this new inspiration i seek needs to be more than a friend
or maybe i need to find something else

now i think it is the pot chocolate talking
and so i stop
goodbye my sweet darlings

elle


above is abra and i on new years eve '05/ '06