Wednesday Feb 15, 2006

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Ugh, I am sick. blackeyed

I stocked up Sav-On's generic version of Airborne. Yay.

A few random thoughts:

Lately I'm hard pressed to actually want to be social, and I know that many friendships have fallen by the wayside as I am overwhelmed with work, educational possibilities, and not to mention my ever changing world view.

The universe is so much bigger than me, and I've procrastinated on broadening my horizons for awhile now. Mainly financial related difficulties, and I've grown to immensely resent the fact that I have supported myself since I was 15. No safety net, no cushion. Some people can relate, but most cannot. frown

I visit and occupy very superficial worlds on a daily and weekly basis in Beverly Hills, snooty parts of the Valley, etc., and believe me, the rich and "privileged" do not have it better. With all the Restyloxed individuals I encounter, what about personality transplants? My goodness. I'd be rich myself if I could fuse things like humility, class, and dignity into their implants and injections.

There was a woman that went off on me today, and I was not feeling well at all (didn't I mentioned that I was sick at the start of this journal?)

I've got a very special talent in that I am skilled in becoming calmer than the hysterical person, no matter what the scenario, and I don't mean to push buttons by doing so, honestly. The irrational diva-like person then looks even more hysterical, and I just don't take it personally. You can't, especially with all the VIP types that I encounter on a regular basis. VIP in their own minds and very special circles, somehow I think that they compensate with their egos and entitlement issues.

I've been oft fascinated with the so-called "elite" in every facet of the sense, as I am very curious if they have it better off.

They don't, is my overwhelming assumption, due to diligent and drawn out research.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
estrada:
Having a cushion can be a burden as well, because it feels as if there is a giant boulder on my back trying to live up to the expectations of those who are there in times of trouble, to show them that I am not a waste and to give back as much as I used tenfold.
cherry:
I can relate on the supporting yourself since you've been 15. I'm sure we talked about that when I was in LA-land. Whenever I listen to friends and other people talking about falling back on their safety net I feel a little sad. It's difficult, actually with my boyfriend who has the most supportive family and a (fairly) well off grandmother who have put him through university, a masters and now a PhD. I'm a little jealous, but try not to be because he spoils me and tells me how I'll get to go to school and do all the things I've always wanted to do once he's finished his stuff and can get a good paying job and support me. Maybe it'll come true, maybe it won't. But, I just wish I could do it on my own and not have to rely on anyone else to support me. It's difficult to not feel sorry for yourself sometimes, I feel you on that.

I've always wondered if that upper-middle-class world really has it better. I guess everthing has it's negative points. Like you've pointed out money can't buy personalities.

I hope you're feeling better soon kiss

[Edited on Feb 16, 2006 2:47PM]

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