*anniversary of an uninteresting event.
well, i am mad sick. i caught a cold or a cough or something like that. i had to call in to work today. oh well, i got plenty of rest.
i went to bed last night at like nine in the evening and then woke up at like two in the afternoon. after taking some mail to the post office and infecting them there i came home, made some soup, and continued to catch some z's. around nine, i got a call from a friend asking if i wanted to go out and get fucked up (drink). i passed, of course.
i tried to lay back down but got a text message from my ex. she asked if i was home and asked if i wanted to come check out her new apartment. of course, i got my ass up and tried to look as good as i could (considering i look like shit in the first place) and headed out the door.
not much went on i suppose. we just hung out and watched tv. talked about stupid things that no one really talks about, much less cares about.
the other day she came over (sunday) and it was really cool. we just hung out on my bed and talked. she would rest her head on me alot but i am very weary as to what her motives are. why? because she has talked and made motions that have led me to believe that things would mend and that we'd give it another try (she was dating someone else at the time). anyway, she seems sincere but there is always that doubt in the back of your mind where the alarms sound off and the red lights are flashing for you not to fall again.
sunday she was only supposed to stay until like six thirty or something and when it came around that time she said 'oh, i should leave...' but stayed longer. she stayed till like eight o'clock i think. she was supposed to be at some going away party for another co-worker.
the most confusing part is when she was leaving. there was a lady pushing a stroller and had what i presume would be her daughter by the hand. the little girl was dressed really...hm... dressed overly nice, i guess you would say. anyway, racheal made a comment about how if she had a daughter she would dress her down and make her look more 'stylin'. i quickly remembered that in most of my dreams, my first child is always a girl. i told her about that and she replied saying 'yeah, i always dream my first kid is a boy....but if we had kids, we'd prolly end up with a girl.'
i kinda chuckled at it but internally i was like 'uhhh.......'
and when she was leaving to her car she gave me a massive hug and it seemed like when i pulled away (assuming the hug timing was coming to an end) she pulled me close again.
i dont know whats going on. maybe something will come of it. maybe i am too sick to even realize that its all just a mirage. maybe its the damn drugs.
maybe i just dont exist. hah.
well, i am mad sick. i caught a cold or a cough or something like that. i had to call in to work today. oh well, i got plenty of rest.
i went to bed last night at like nine in the evening and then woke up at like two in the afternoon. after taking some mail to the post office and infecting them there i came home, made some soup, and continued to catch some z's. around nine, i got a call from a friend asking if i wanted to go out and get fucked up (drink). i passed, of course.
i tried to lay back down but got a text message from my ex. she asked if i was home and asked if i wanted to come check out her new apartment. of course, i got my ass up and tried to look as good as i could (considering i look like shit in the first place) and headed out the door.
not much went on i suppose. we just hung out and watched tv. talked about stupid things that no one really talks about, much less cares about.
the other day she came over (sunday) and it was really cool. we just hung out on my bed and talked. she would rest her head on me alot but i am very weary as to what her motives are. why? because she has talked and made motions that have led me to believe that things would mend and that we'd give it another try (she was dating someone else at the time). anyway, she seems sincere but there is always that doubt in the back of your mind where the alarms sound off and the red lights are flashing for you not to fall again.
sunday she was only supposed to stay until like six thirty or something and when it came around that time she said 'oh, i should leave...' but stayed longer. she stayed till like eight o'clock i think. she was supposed to be at some going away party for another co-worker.
the most confusing part is when she was leaving. there was a lady pushing a stroller and had what i presume would be her daughter by the hand. the little girl was dressed really...hm... dressed overly nice, i guess you would say. anyway, racheal made a comment about how if she had a daughter she would dress her down and make her look more 'stylin'. i quickly remembered that in most of my dreams, my first child is always a girl. i told her about that and she replied saying 'yeah, i always dream my first kid is a boy....but if we had kids, we'd prolly end up with a girl.'
i kinda chuckled at it but internally i was like 'uhhh.......'
and when she was leaving to her car she gave me a massive hug and it seemed like when i pulled away (assuming the hug timing was coming to an end) she pulled me close again.
i dont know whats going on. maybe something will come of it. maybe i am too sick to even realize that its all just a mirage. maybe its the damn drugs.
maybe i just dont exist. hah.